Visiting Peace
by ifyoucatchacriminal
Summary: After his life catches up with him, John visits a certain Scot. All mistakes are my own ...
1. Chapter 1

**Okay, don't shoot me but it's just an idea I had and it's dragged out a long way. I know the chapters aren't long but it had taken me forever and a day to write all of this. I hope you like it and feel free to review (Constructive Criticism please) and I'll do my best to keep it going. Sorry about any grammar, punctuation or spelling mistakes but I don't think it's too bad.**

**Another thing; I'm English so I do apologise if you can see the differences in language but I've tried my best. Hopefully I've done okay with Carson's character, I've got a whole lot of Scottish family so I hope I've done them justice. Happy reading?**

Day One

"Colonel Shepphard, good to see you again" the thick Scottish accent travelled across the clinical examination room. The Atlantis Expedition had advanced rapidly since the first days of its founders. Ten long years had drifted right past them. Each of the original SGA-1 had eventually and begrudgingly retired, seeking new starts in war-free, peaceful areas. Colonel John Shepphard had chosen to live in the warm climates of California, where his large family resided; John took a vacancy to teaching the new fresh-faced generation how to be pilots.

Doctor Rodney McKay worked hard at having all of his scientific research declassified in order for him to boast his ground-breaking accomplishments. He'd progressed to win half a dozen Nobel prizes at the disgust of his colleagues, he'd also received several medals of honour and bravery from his proud country of Canada; these medals had been more substantial than the glittering Nobel prizes he'd won as they held more importance in his heart of all places.

Teyla, well she'd returned to her people once she'd acknowledged that her services were no longer crucial to the expedition; she was heartbroken that her friends were leaving her but also grateful as she could now lead her own people to become as great as those she had worked with. She also had her family to think of: her husband who asked for nothing more than love; her son who required constant attention and thrived off the knowledge of his mother; her own mother who she felt obliged to as this was the person who raised her to be the person she has become today.

Ronon Dex had migrated to Earth, much to the annoyance of General Landry who had to sign-off on all of the one-hundred sheets of paper that allowed him to do so. Ronon had continued his work with the SGC, aiding the preparation of the young and hopeful marines soon to travel to Atlantis; once Ronon had finished with them they were no longer excited, more anxious and cautious, many of them transformed from boys to men when they worked with Ronon, and the expedition leaders were eternally grateful.

Doctor Carson Beckett however, left America completely. Nobody knew what really happened, they all had suspicions he would return to Scotland but he'd never kept in contact almost as if he'd wanted to forget the whole experience. It took John Shepphard three days to track the man down; using a few favours from people in high places.

Now, John Shepphard stood there feebly in the office of his colleague: his friend. Neither had changed drastically in appearance apart from several grey hairs in amongst their still brown hair. John's hair was less wild than it used to be, he looked more mature which wasn't necessarily a good thing. John hadn't seen or heard from the doctor in the ten years since Atlantis so John was perplexed at what conversation he should start.

John stood less than five metres for the man, holding nothing but his small black rucksack and his most cherished aviator sunglasses "So doc, how've you been?" He plastered one of his award winning smiles across his secretly anxious face. "I've been well Colonel; thank you for asking. How has your life treated you?" John stopped to think of every simple lie he could say to the curious man but chose to keep it brief and basic "It's been okay, I'm still flying so that's always good" Carson nodded and smiled in acknowledgement. "I take it you're like the village doctor? I thought you would have gone back to your research."

Carson shrugged gently "Aye, but it's years' worth of research, and it was all based around Pegasus so it was almost a waste of time. I realised that my abilities are put too much better use here, and I get to see my family whenever I like." John could understand that, he himself had quickly returned to his family for a support system as he had to readjust to life on Earth; they all did.

"So how is the family?" John asked casually just for conversation as even five seconds of silence became the most awkward of situations. "Aye they're fabulous" Carson's eyes shone with pride "My sister just had a wee baby girl, Annie" his smile was bright as he thought of them. John had no other response than to replicate Carson's smile.

"Colonel, can I ask what on Earth you're doing here? It can't just be a casual visit- it's a wee bit far to be doing that." Carson still had his hint of sarcasm. "Well I got ordered to go on vacation; banned from America for at least a month. I thought I'd do some travelling but nowhere really stands out anymore, not since Atlantis. It was then that I decided to find people rather than places and the furthest person away was you so I got on a plane." Carson rolled his eyes, John was the worst workaholic he'd ever met, if he wasn't sleeping or eating he'd be working, he wasn't one for relaxing.

"You know Zalenka lives here too?" Carson enquired. "Yeah I heard a rumour, couldn't quite believe it myself. Are you still in touch with him?" John was genuinely curious as he was another person he'd not stayed in contact with. "Aye, see him maybe once a week- that's when Stuart can drag him away from his work. He may not be working with Rodney anymore but he's just as dedicated."

John raised an eyebrow at the mention of Stuart, Carson noticed. "Aye, I wouldn't have thought you would have known. About five years ago Radek got married, as Stuart's British it's all legal and that. I've never seen Radek happier in all fairness, and Stuart's a really nice guy. He's an architect in Edinburgh so he's often working away but he spends every other minute with Radek." John was pleasantly surprised: He's just found out Radek was gay and that he had married without anybody knowing.

"Can I ask why you didn't stay in contact? I can understand wanting to get away but we were a sort of family, as screwed up family, but a family nonetheless." John could see that he had hit a sore spot so he backed off "Rodney had a theory that you had some secret mission to go do; he really needs to stop reading comic books." John chuckled softly over the awkwardness of the moment. Carson had slumped in his high backed leather chair.

"There were things I wasn't brave enough to face" Carson stated in almost a whisper, looking sad and a little ashamed. The silence grew, as did the awkwardness. John took it upon himself to speak first "I'm sorry if I overstepped my mark; it's really not my business. It is good to see you again though, you look well." Carson smiled, more relaxed now.

"Where are you planning to stay?" Carson enquired; John responded eagerly "A hotel around the corner, I think" Carson shook his head in mock disapproval. "Nah, I won't have any friend of mine staying in a hotel; my house is plenty big enough." John smiled and accepted the offer.

As Carson had now finished his hard day of work, he collected his black jacket from his chair and his black leather briefcase from under his desk which was scattered with paperwork. Carson lead John out of his office and back to the reception area where there was a young blonde female behind a small pine desk with a laptop. "You finished for the day, doc?" The women smiled pleasantly, Carson stood facing her "Aye, I'll leave the paperwork" He reduced his voice to a whisper "Got a guest on my hands"

Carson chuckled along with the woman "As long as you keep him away from all your family it should go smoothly, but there's fat chance of that happening especially if you're at the house." Carson rolled his eyes in agreement, "Aye, well Lisa, I'll leave you to lock this place up and then you can get off; I'll do the paperwork later love." Lisa, the receptionist smiled brightly in appreciation. John was amused at the conversation and held a bright smile on his face with no effort needed which, more recently, was a rare occurrence.

**Was it a good start? I mean, I know it's not a whole lot to go on but I hope that it gets better for you... If you feel any of the characters are off, let me know? I'll do my best to alter it.**

****Sorry if you have to reread a lot of this story, I had a moment and went through all of it all over again and tried to make some improvements...Hopefully it's better though****


	2. Chapter 2

**Okay, so this is the second chapter and just about where the story is hopefully going to go a little deeper as the last chapter was rather vague and disappointingly shallow. Again, any constructive criticism is welcome, as well as nice comments so I can feel happy because this isn't complete tosh.**

Carson turned to John and headed out of the glass front door to the concrete car park where the sun was still shining brightly. The first thing Carson noticed was the immensely expensive Mercedes-Benz McLaren SLS in a gleaming shade of silver; of course it was John's. "I see your taste for toys hasn't differed."

Carson cracked, "The house is only a minute walk from here so you can either leave the car here, and there's CCTV and all sorts, or I can show you how to drive to my house which is more like five minutes, up to you but the suns shining" John thought for a moment. "Let me get my bag out the trunk and we'll walk, might help some of the jet lag."

Carson chuckled at John's use of the word 'trunk'. There were no Americans locally so he had to get used to it all over again. John centrally unlocked his car and opened the boot, true to his word there was a large black holdall as well as several sealed files.

John heaved the bag and secured it onto his back before rejoining Carson. "Off we go then colonel." Carson was right, the walk has leaded us out of the car park and across an almost desolate road and through a small snicket which was embroidered with spring flowers.

"It's pretty here." John exclaimed. Carson smiled humorously. "I never thought I'd ever hear you say 'pretty' colonel, but aye it's lovely this time of year." It wasn't mockery in the least. "Yeah well, I've changed since Atlantis. I'm not a hard-ass anymore and I use words like 'pretty'" John retorted, Carson almost wondered what had made the man change, it was something he'd have to ask about later.

They had reached the end of the alleyway when john stopped in his tracks, "man, that's a beautiful house." he said, barely audible to anyone but Carson. The road that immediately intersected the alleyway was small and narrow but winded on into the horizon, just set back from the road by several metres was a stunning, red brick, ivy covered house with carvings in the stone surrounds of all the windows. It looked like it was old but something breathed a breath of fresh air.

Carson chuckled lightly; John almost didn't notice but turned slowly towards the man with a querying eyebrow. "Welcome to Beckett Manor." He chuckled again, more loudly this time; the genuine shock obtusely spread over John's face was terribly amusing.

"Beckett Manor? As in, this is your house?" John had confirmed his theory before he believed it. "Aye, well it's not just mine. It belongs to the whole family but it's only me and me' mother that live here now; I've taken her into my care" Carson explained in such a way that John would be forced to understand but hopefully not overwhelmed.

"Jesus Christ, are your family millionaires?" Carson smiled and rolled his eyes, "Not millionaires, the house had been passed down the generations, it used to belong to my great grandfather, he was a magnificent man." Carson thought fondly. "Come on, I'll show you around." Carson tugged at John's arm as he was still awestruck.

Carson lead John up to the grand entrance, an overhang sheltered the giant dark oak door; again the feeling of high-tech came to mind. His instincts had been correct as Carson pulled away a slice of a brick to reveal a touch screen, Carson quickly entered a six-digit code; you could hear the lock mechanism as the door swung open to reveal the gleaming marble interior of the foyer.

"Holy..." John was cut off. "It's not that big once you get used to it. This is the main attraction really, apart from the living room." John nodded in mock agreement "Of course, because this house isn't the most amazing house I've ever seen in my life" John shrugged; Carson rolled his eyes once more. "Tell you what, you leave your stuff by the stairs and we'll sort some food out seeing as though it's getting late."

John nodded quickly before heaving his bag back down to the ground, he flinched as Carson shouted. "Joanna, can you do us a favour?" John wondered who Carson was shouting to until a young woman with blonde hair came racing down the stairs, she can't have been older than twenty-five as she was still young and fresh faced. "Carson" she said fondly "You're home early, oh you have a guest?" she hinted for an introduction as she eyed John from head to heel.

"Put your eyes back in your head, this is Colonel John Shepphard, Colonel, this is Joanna. Joanna, could you have John's bag put in the green room please, and what's for tea?" Over their years in Atlantis, John had got used to the fact that Carson labelled their evening meal 'tea' and was not in fact the beverage he originally knew it to be.

"What did your last servant die of? And you've got chicken with a warm salad." She smiled back at Carson before again glancing at John, "So, colonel, where are you from?" John smiled easily as the woman seemed pleasant enough.

"Please, call me John, and I'm from California." He gave her his best smile. "It's probably warmer there than it is here; I don't know why you'd bother. Nice to meet you though...John" Carson turned both himself and John around swiftly and headed through a door to the right of the entrance.

"This is the dining room slash small kitchen area, it's probably one of the most used rooms in the house; there is a bigger kitchen but it's only ever been needed for family weddings and similar events. Jo has apparently cooked us some food so if you'd like to sit down I'll sort it all out." The room wasn't as large as John had imagined, every one of the dark black granite surfaces gleamed under the spot lights, contrasting with the darker pine cupboards, in the middle of the kitchen area was a large pine table with six seats to match.

The room was not brightly lit so it had a cosy homely feel to it. John gently eased one of the chairs from the table, before lowering himself onto it. Carson had wandered over to the oven where he pulled out a medium sized silver baking tray with golden coloured chicken wings; vibrant green cauliflower; bright orange carrot; and small pale Brussels. John's mouth watered as he eyed the food eagerly. Carson served the meal onto three plates, putting one under a heating lamp and carrying the other two over to the table.

"There you go colonel. I think Jo will join us soon and I do apologise if she pesters you..." Carson started forking his vegetables. "No, it's no problem. Out of interest, who is Joanna?" John had also tucked into his meal as they conversed.

"She's basically my housekeeper but she only does that so she can live here, but I wouldn't mind she's good company." John was relieved to realise that Carson hadn't also married without notification, not that he wouldn't be happy for the man, but he would have been hurt.

"So colonel, why did you get forced leave? They find out your addiction to working too?" John rolled his eyes, "Something like that. A month ago I had an accident, not my fault, one of the engines failed on me and I only just survived but my co-pilot wasn't so lucky. Dom was a good guy, his mom was devastated." John paused before his voice cracked.

Carson could see the deep sadness laced in John's eyes and smiled sincerely "Sorry, it must have been hard." John picked up again, like he always did and replied "Yeah, but I remember the good times, we flew over the great wall which was fun, took a picture; felt like we were about ten metres away, it was amazing." John reached into his back pocket and retrieved his wallet, opening it to show Carson the photograph.

Carson's eyebrows raised in astonishment as the picture was so clear. Carson didn't notice the creased picture of the man to be known in the future as Dom, and the reason why such an intimate picture should be in his possession.

"Evening John, Carson." Joanna strolled towards the heating light where she collected her own plate and sat down with the two men at the dining table. "Do you fancy opening a bottle o' wine Colonel? There's some on the side I've been meaning to have."

Both of the men had finished their meals when Carson had asked, so he collected the plates gently placing them in the sink and retrieved a bottle of red wine and three glasses. "Sure, thanks" John smiled as Carson laid the glasses on the table as he carefully popped the corkscrew which sealed the bottle.

He poured half a measure in each and spread the glasses to their rightful receivers, Joanna smiled and took a sip and John copied her moments later. "This is good." John commented as Carson put the bottle in the middle of the table and sipped from his glass. "Aye, and what do you reckon Jo?" He asked her, "It's good, quite rich though." The conversation gently continued as Joanna finished her meal and even afterwards.

They spoke about what they had done for the last ten years, their families and homes and their work before Carson noticed that it was ten o'clock. "Blimey, we've been sat here for five hours." he yawned, stepping away from the table, "I'll clean up Jo, you can get to bed if you like, I know you've got work in the morning."

"Thanks Carson, night Colonel." She smiled and exited the room and up the stairs. "Sweet girl, smart too." John helped Carson clear away the glasses "Aye, she grew up fast. Her mother's a complete bitch at the best of times and ended up kicking Jo out at fourteen so she could live with her arse hole of a boyfriend" John had never heard so much foul language flow out of Carson's mouth so he knew he wasn't exaggerating.

"I'd known Jo since she was a baby; I was given the honour of godfather when I turned twenty one. I'm glad now for it, because she's one of the family now." John could sense the pride in the doctor's voice.

Carson lead John back out into the foyer to a door on the opposite side. "This. This is the living room, Carson gestured for John to go in. The room was small but open; the large stone built open fire as the heart of the room with immaculate modern furniture complimenting it. The balance of old and new was impeccable, the solid oak beams lined with small light fittings casting a warm glow into the room.

Carson took his place on one of the sofas and John followed sitting reasonably close to the doctor. "I can see why you love it so much, it's awesome." John's comments were as if he were a child in a sweet shop.

"Aye, this remote gets you the TV if you want to watch anything, we have a lot of channels streaming from America too so you don't have to miss out." John listened carefully but had no idea as to where the television was actually located.

Carson quickly picked up on his confusion and pointed to the remote, pressing the on button. "Hidden under the painting, it was a little self-indulgence at the time." As Carson spoke the painting hanging from the wall above the fire rose up revealing a large television, speakers in each corner of the room also came into view.

"Boys and their toys?" Carson giggled. "Aye, but I promise there's nothing as good as this in any of the other rooms apart from maybe mine and Jo's bedrooms; TV's in the foot of the bed and other various bit and pieces." John chortled at the description of all the gadgets Carson had strategically placed around his home.

"If you want to get some rest I can show you to your room, there's nothing to be missed."

John took up Carson's offer and was escorted up the glorious main stair in the foyer to a medium size bedroom with a green colour scheme, hence the label 'green room' John thought. "I appreciate you letting me stay doc, and I'd love for you to drop the colonel, I'm not a soldier anymore." Carson nodded in agreement, "Only of you do the same...Good night, John"

Carson stepped away from the doorway and back into the corridor. "If you need anything feel free to get it, food and drinks are all in the kitchen but you may have to rummage a bit; if you need any more bedding, towel, and sheets they're in the cupboard in the bathroom; the bathroom is right behind me." Carson threw his thumb over his shoulder, "Good night John, sleep well" He smiled once more before continuing down the corridor to his own bedroom.

John stepped further into his room noticing his back was on his bed with a note laid on top:

_'There's space in the wardrobe and drawers for all of your things, if you want to lock it you just have to press 974 when you shut it and again before you open it. If you need any laundry doing put it in the basket and I'll collect it once a day; Carson's useless at housework. _

_There's also a phone if you look on the desk; feel free to call back to America, the bills are all paid for. If you need anything else you can call me from the phone- I'm speed dial 2, Carson being number 1. Otherwise, have a nice time and make yourself at home. _

_Joanna.' _

John grinned to himself in appreciation, nobody had ever made him feel this welcome in their home before, granted it was huge, but it was still full of love. John gently took out his clothes from his bag and transferred them to the wardrobe and drawers as Joanna had suggested.

John took out his wash kit and placed it on the side. John carefully went back to his back, reluctantly fishing out an A4 diary, placing it in one of the small drawers in his bedside table and locking it. John quickly changed into pyjamas and almost instantaneously fell asleep.

**So, I kind of like the idea that Carson has this quite high standard way of living but he's still the down-to-earth guy we all knew and loved on Atlantis. I'm also aware that when I write I jump to the point far too quickly, leaving out details that would make the story more interesting so if you've got any suggestions just add in I'll be happy to take a look.**


	3. Chapter 3

**This is a longer chapter, it contains all of the dramatic bits that kind of make the story so it was pretty much necessary. I do apologise for any long paragraphs too, I know how boring it can be and you end up skipping a lot but I've tried my best to split it up into smaller chunks. Again, any helpful, or even nice comments are much appreciated. Also, take into account that I do most of my writing after 9pm so my mind doesn't always pay attention to errors I make, comment if it bothers you.**

Day Two

John was awoken the next morning by the knocking on his door; he rubbed his eyes as he climbed out of bed and made his way towards the door, opening it. Carson was stood there chipper as anything "Morning!" He stood there in dark blue jeans, a black t-shirt and zip-up hoody and black socks. John had never seen the man in such an informal manner, even whilst working he wore a shirt, tie and waistcoat.

"Morning Carson." John slurred in reply. Carson just laughed, "I'll give you time to change and then you can have some breakfast, Jo made pancakes before she left." John became livelier at the mention of pancakes. "I'll be down in five." John spat out eagerly.

John almost ran down the stairs down to the kitchen as the smell intruded his nasal passages. John hadn't had pancakes for longer than he cared to remember and his mouth drooled at the thought. "Aye, you're still predictable." Carson laughed as he balanced two plates on one arm and a carton of orange in the other.

John took one of the plates from Carson and set it before himself. "Well some things are worth being predictable for." John attempted to defend his pride, in which Carson responded by rolling his eyes and taking his own seat at the table.

"I'm not working today so is there anything I can do for you?" Carson asked politely, obliging to service his guest. "I'm not sure actually, but I'm open to suggestions." John mumbled over his mouthfuls of food, Carson barely understood.

"Well, if you want to be a tourist I can show you around, there's not a whole lot to see that isn't just old though; or you can continue settling into the house, there's all sorts of hidden passages and rooms if you look hard." John was intrigued as the thought of Narnia came to mind and he chuckled silently.

"I'm okay with staying in, is it okay if I make a call though?" John knew that the note left by Joanna had said it was but he wanted to make sure. "Aye, that's fine. I think Radek will be dropping by later too." John was happy at the thought as it was another man he had missed terribly who had not stayed in contact.

John was anxious about the meeting though as he and Radek had not left each other on the best of terms. "He wants to see you" Carson broke John's chain of thought. "He knows that what happened was for the best, and now he just wants to see his friend."

The emotions flooding into John were almost too much to bear and his eyes welled up at the thought of finally being forgiven.

It was the worst day John had lived through; he'd put the whole galaxy at risk to try and destroy the wraith, the attempt had been successful but everyone questioned his humanity and no longer put their trust in him. John was the first to retire.

John snuffed trying to replace his game face. "It was drastic, and the people of Atlantis weren't willing to sacrifice what lives they had. You lead them forward in a time of darkness; you were the best thing that happened to Earth." Carson's gentle words hit home.

The two men sat with their empty plates, John staring downward with Carson glaring at him with worry before gently lifting his chin "You're a good man, John." John couldn't withhold anymore and his back jerked as silent sobs broke out.

The soldier was broke and Carson's heart broke. This man had saved two galaxies in a day, to be accused of having a death wish for all. Up until today he had stayed strong, always knowing he did the right thing, despite losing everything. Forgiveness was something he'd only dreamed of.

Carson moved around as grasped John's shoulders, pulling him into a hug. He held the weeping man tight to his chest until he became less tense and relaxed into Carson. John slowly raised his head to see Carson just smiling at him, the doctors smile was worth everything to him it was as if the sun was rising on a new day and a new breath of fresh air came to him.

"Thanks, and I'm sorry for breaking down on you." Carson stepped gently away from the man and John felt the cool air hit him once more instead of the heat radiating from Carson. "You can't be a soldier all the time, John, and you know you don't have to be around me you can trust me with anything." Relief emanated from John as he felt ever better.

"How about I show you around the village, then you can relax. At least then you'll know where you can go if you need anything. You'll need a jumper, it may be sunny but it can be quite cold." Carson gestured at the white skin-tight t-shirt John was wearing.

John collected the plates and put them on the side, Carson stood beside him but reached over to the wall where there was a small black stylus hanging from a small metal chain. He picked it up and began writing on the wall, John was confused until Carson explained "It's another gadget, it's a screen. I'm just writing a note for Jo for later."

Carson and John then strolled out and went to their respective bedrooms: John collecting a black turtle neck military standard jumper with an embroidered golden eagle on the front, the symbol of a pilot; both of the men had also retrieved casual trainer shoes.

The two men met in the hallway before making their way back to the grand front door. Once again Carson revealed a hidden keypad and entered the six digit code, mumbling under his breath "Need to get a card from Jo." Carson stepped out with John right behind him; the sun was shining brightly and the fresh clean air bombarding John.

They took the reverse of the route they had walked yesterday, this time finding a pathway on the other side of the car park leading down a small, quaint high street occasionally dotted with houses. They walked roughly half way down the narrow street until they reached a small shop front painted in a vibrant shade of red.

"I need to pop in here a minute, if you like you can come with me or you can have a wander and I'll catch up with you." John chose to stay with Carson as it was unfamiliar land and his instincts told him to stick with what he knows.

They both stepped in the shop as a small brass bell rang over their heads, the woman sitting at the high desk at the far end sat up to attend to them "Doctor Beckett, Good morning!" She too had a thick Scottish brogue but seemed cheerful enough, "Hello my darling, how are you this morning?" It almost sounded as if Carson was trying to give her a medical, it must be what it's like to live in a small village, you get to know everybody.

"Aye, I'm well lad thank you for asking, what can I do for you sweet?" Obviously Carson was both well-known and well loved by this particular woman. She must have been in her sixties, greying hair evident and her glasses hanging from a string fastened around her neck, and laugh line protruding her eyes. "The usual if you don't mind."

John took to observing all of the stationery lining the walls, he still wasn't sure of the purpose of the shop "Post office." Carson hinted at John, who had a light bulb switch on. "Ah who's the lovely gentleman Carson?"

Carson rolled his eyes as the women looked suggestively at John, who smiled brightly back at her. Carson cleared this throat, " , this is Colonel John Shepphard, an old friend of mine."

John made his way over to the counter to shake the elder woman's hand, "Please, it's just John ma'am, pleased to meet you." The lady raised an eyebrow "Ah, an American Carson; so...John, what do you do for a living?"

John obliged to answer her question "I'm a fighter jet pilot with the air force ma'am." She seemed impressed and Carson tittered. "Remember you're married, will you?" Mrs. Shaw flapped off Carson's comment and John laughed. "A pilot, mmm." she turned back to Carson "I'm sure Frank would flirt too if a gorgeous girl spoke to him. Then again I don't think any girl in their right mind would talk to him so it's tough luck. Here you go dear."

She handed several sheets of paper to Carson after she had stamped them; Carson began to walk out "Thanks, Irene, I'll see you tomorrow morning?" She nodded in confirmation before tapping John's arm "If you ever need anything dear, just come and see me but I think Carson will have you all sorted out, he's a good lad."

Carson rolled his eyes as he overheard. "Stop talking about me!" He joked "Come on John, before she makes you stay for afternoon tea" The two men left as the woman shouted towards Carson. The two men continued walking down the path laughing at the lady.

"Over there is the corner shop, or as you know it a 'convenience store' it's ran by George Lambert, lovely chap, keeps to himself a lot though." Carson pointed to a shop front painted in a deep green. "On the other side is the bakery with Mrs Chapel who's just as flirty as Mrs Shaw so be aware." Carson chuckled, and I suppose you'll probably figure everything else out as you go."

They continued walking. "This is Patrick's sweet shop, a childhood past time of mine. Patrick's been running it forever so as you can imagine he's ancient but is still fighting fit and appreciates some company from time to time."

Carson opened the door and let John in; again a brass bell rang over the door. "Ah, good morning Carson," A man appeared from under the desk. All three walls of the room were lined from floor to ceiling with glass jars filled with sweets of every variety. "How are you Patrick?" Carson asked happily. "I'm good thank you. Who's your friend?" Everyone seemed to be curious as to who the mysterious man was "Patrick, this is Colonel John Shepphard, John, this is Patrick."

Carson gestured for John to shake the man's hand, which he did freely "Nice to meet you sir." Yet another eyebrow rose. "I didn't know you knew anybody from America Carson." Patrick almost questioned. "You remember when I went to do research? Well John was part of the crew." John nodded in agreement.

Patrick smiled at him, "So, what can I do for you son?" Carson's eyebrows furrowed in thought which John thought was…cute. "You chose Patrick, you always know best." The man chuckled and began assembling a bag.

Carson turned back to John and spoke quietly, "So, we'll go back to the house and start on dinner for when Radek and Stuart arrive. You can explore or you can give me a hand, I don't mind either way, I do warn you I am a messy chef though." John laughed as he knew Carson to be a man of tidiness, it was essential in his field, but this was an admission to not being perfect.

John had butterflies in his stomach as his heart warmed to his old friend, knowing him all over again. John still wasn't ready to reveal his reasons for coming here though; it was something that took time. "I suppose I'll help you out, it sounds like it could be quite amusing." Carson gave him a bright smile, and their eyes connected in knowing.

Patrick cleared his throat. "Here you go Carson, and it was nice to meet you Colonel." John reached over and shook his hand one again "Please, it's John, and it was my pleasure. You have an amazing store here." Patrick blushed slightly under the heavy compliment. "Come on you, otherwise you'll have even Patrick wanting to 'woo' you" Carson once again tugged on John's arm to walk out of the shop.

"You're so jealous, they lurrrv me." John joked, "Nah, they adore you far too much, you seem to be the heart of the village. I'm not surprised really; you wear yours on your sleeve." It was Carson's turn to blush. They walked back to the house, back up the high street; across the car park and through the alleyway.

As soon as they got in the door they shucked off their jackets laying them on a nearby bench. "Right, I'll go give Stuart a quick ring, you can either go in the kitchen or sit down and relax, or you can do both."

John walked through to the kitchen, taking a stool that was a part of a small breakfast bar but was close to the cooking area. Carson quietly stepped into the living room, lifting the phone from its cradle and dialling.

"Hi Stuart, its Carson. Just to let you know dinner is going to be at three this time, for a couple of obvious reasons."

"_Yeah, I can understand that, Radek's quite anxious…"_

"Yeah, so is John, I hope this goes well…I know John's going through some stuff- it's the only reason he'd run. I just hope Radek can give him a head start on dealing with it."

_"Poor guy, I know he messed up but I can't imagine how he felt. I'll talk to Radek; I know he'll get it. So how are you coping?"_

"Well, it was odd to have him just turn up, not that it isn't a good thing. I've missed the team ever since I left, John the most. I just hope I can help him, he's just a lost little boy at the moment that could crack at any moment, not that he's not strong enough to handle it."

_"Well, he's not porcelain that's for sure…Just don't exhaust yourself, you can't save everybody Carson, you can just be there for them. I'll see you just before three then, we'll bring a bottle."_

"Much appreciated Stu, see you then, bye." Carson replaced the phone and strolled back to where John was sat.

"So, Radek and Stuart are going to arrive about ten-to-three, which gives us about two and half hours." John nodded in acknowledgement. "You know what? I can't be arsed cooking, how about we order in? We'll get pizza, Chinese and Italian all in one go." John snorted, "Okay." He smiled at the lack of effort by the Scotsman.

"Want to talk?" Carson asked John in a slightly more serious manner whilst pouring him a glass of wine. "I don't know where to start Carson" it was a surprise how quickly John let his mask down, or rather how shallow it had risen.

"Anywhere, I know you didn't just turn up here. You're running, and I want to know what from. I'll wait as long as you need, but I need you to give me something."

"There isn't anything, there's nothing left. My Dad ordered me to go on leave, I was so screwed up and he knew I needed to run."

"O'Neill? He's a good man and he were right, even though you've only been here a day I've seen you smile at least twice, which is rare."

"Yeah, I forget that I can be happy. Sometimes just not being anything is easier…" John stared down at his glass.

"Come on, I want to show you something." Carson took the glass out of John's hands and grabbed his forearm. They went upstairs, along the corridor, down another until they came to the end where there was a locked door.

"This is what I did when I came back. I didn't talk for months, it was Stuart who brought me back to reality, and for that I am forever grateful but I did this." He unlocked the door with a rusty key that was on a chain around his neck.

John stood in shock as the door was opened. The walls were littered with paper. Everywhere. Some were letters to the people he loved, some were intoxicated with medical research. Some were just his thoughts, it all looked so angry.

The room was dark and just had a bed in the corner, the sheets ruined with ink stains and tears. The man had fallen apart and John wouldn't have ever known about it. "I don't need to tell you what I went through, it's here. I just want you to realise that you aren't alone, your burden may be a hell of a lot larger but it's all the same."

A flood of emotion hit John and a single tear rolled down his cheek. Carson heard the slight sniffle and took the man out of the room, locking it once more. They went to a spare bedroom next door.

Carson led John to sit down, John tried to breathe so he could talk but he knew his voice would crack no matter what. "Atlantis was crap, I knew what happened was unimaginable to everybody but it happened. I took the blame, I always knew I would have to…Maybe losing all of my friends was an afterthought." John's body betrayed it and tears streamed down his face.

"Dad and Daniel were always there for me, no matter what. If they weren't I probably wouldn't be here; which is silly because I'm not that sort of person." Carson rubbed John's back reassuringly and John appreciated the warm and kind touch.

"Life caught up with me, Dom grounded me but now he's gone. I just don't know what the hell I'm meant to do now." Was John gay? The only people that were able to be a saviour were the ones who meant the most to you. Stuart was an example of that- He and Carson had grown up together, best friends.

"That's something you have to sort out on your own, but I'm here John. You've just got a little lost, and you came here to get back on track. I'm glad you came John." The soldier was human, finally.

He'd lost the ability to feel anything and now he felt it all, he felt the joy at Carson's flirting with the women in the village; the pain of Dom; the shattering of his whole life; the comfort of Carson the calm he cast upon him.

Carson dragged John in for a hug, not macho at all but John really couldn't care less. "You great big teddy bear, you're anything but nothing. Come on, wines getting warm and there's food to be ordered." John chuckled gently through his drying tears.

The comfort of Carson's arm was enough to make his whole body feel alive and he loved every moment of it. They sat there for a couple of minutes before John spoke up "Thank you Carson, I don't know what I'd do." Carson released his grip of John and smiled, "Come on, let's go drink wine." They both laughed gently and slowly made their way back to the kitchen.

Dingdong!

"Good evening Carson!" Carson opened the door to a tall blonde male, average build with bright blue eyes that were enchanting. "Stuart, good to see you, come in please" Carson gestured through to the kitchen as he greeted Radek. John was still sat on the stool in the kitchen, serving the meals they ordered onto the dining table.

1) "Radek, how are you?" Carson asked cautiously. "You know what? I'm anxious but I'm also excited. Despite…everything. I want to see my friend again, and eat some good food!" Carson chuckled as Radek handed him a bottle of wine and followed him through to the kitchen.

2) "You must be Colonel Shepphard" Stuart spoke politely, offering his hand, John freely accepted it "John please, and you must be Stuart." Stuart nodded, "Well we have all sorts of food so take a seat I suppose." The two men took seats at the table as Carson came through. John stood to greet the second guest.

"Colonel Shepphard, it is good to see you again." The silence was slightly awkward "Zalenka, I'm really happy to see you, you look well." He really did. "And you know it's John, I'm not Air Force anymore." Radek nodded as everyone took their seats.

They ate their chosen meals, and drank several glasses of wine before deciding it was time to leave. John and Radek had been able to talk properly and mend their bridges, at least a little. Carson was proud of how well the night had gone.

Carson and John followed the couple to the front door where they said their goodbyes. "It was really good to see you, Radek. I'm just sorry it took me ten years to get here." Radek smiled softly "I think this was how it always was going to go."

John agreed, "You and Stuart are awesome together, I mean you're completely different but it's amazing and I'm glad you're happy finally." John had to at least get that out before they left. Carson closed the door behind them.

"See, you've just done a leap into sorting your head out. You should be proud." Carson patted him on the back. "Right, Jo can wash up as I really can't be bothered. We will go into the living room and finish that bottle." John agreed strongly and made himself comfortable on the couch.

Finishing off the bottle turned into drinking their fourth of the night, by now they were feeling nauseas and open. The conversation they had was cheerful but took a depressing turn when Atlantis came up. "You know, I haven't heard from Teyla. I promised I would see her again but I can't seem to go back."

Carson nodded drowsily. "Aye, but the poor girl was in love with you even when she did give birth, and you didn't even look at her twice." John looked down at his glass and blushed a shade of deep scarlet. "What's up with you?" Carson asked lightly, "I knew she was. I wasn't."

Carson tittered "Well obviously, otherwise you would have got together" Carson was avoiding the truth as much as possible so John would take the next step and tell him his little secret. "No, I wasn't because I'm gay Carson, always have been." John took a deep breath and turned his head away awkwardly.

"Aye, I know John. I just needed to see how much you could trust me, it's a big thing you just told me no matter how public that information may be." Carson was worried as John still hadn't looked at him, he gently stroked his arm "John I've always known, it takes one to know one." John's eyes shot open 'was Carson really saying what he thought he was saying?'

"You can be really blind sometimes, John." Carson forced John to look at him. Carson's eyes were soft as the light from the fire flickered across them. "Yeah, I am. Sorry, I guess I just wasn't expecting this." John readjusted to a more comfortable position taking a small sip of wine.

"You don't have to keep apologising, John, you haven't done anything wrong." John chewed his bottom lip feebly "Habit, I suppose." Carson smiled sweetly as he sensed some of the pent up energy in John be released making him more relaxed. The evening went quietly after that with the topics being spoken of getting lighter and lighter until they both decided it was getting late and made their way to their bedrooms.

**So, I don't know how good a move this chapter was but it plays out quite nicely with the story. There's a 'POV' Seperation towards the end of this chapter and I wanted to explain; it's two conversations happening simultaneously. I wasn't too sure how to write it out so I just did what I thought was best, any suggestion for improvement are very much welcomed.**

**Oh, and the whole 'spare bedroom' thing, I don't think I quite did it justice but I find it hard to write really dark scenes without thinking I've gone about it all wrong ... Again, suggestions?**


	4. Chapter 4

**So, I'll give you a pre-warning. There's smut, as in dirty, sexy, mansex. It's probably a lame attempt at it but hey. I also find it hilarious that it's apparently only been three days and they're already jumping into bed, but you know, it's fiction so what the hell.**

****Day Three

"Jesus Christ." John stumbled thought to the kitchen where Carson and Jo were enjoying a hot cup of _coffee_. "See, works a charm." Carson smirked at Jo whilst John had a puzzled look imprinted on his face. "How's the hangover?" Carson asked cockily.

"I just don't get how you don't feel as awful as I do…You drank just as much." John was genuinely curious. "I'm Scottish; I've been raised on alcohol. I can drink you down any time I like." _Smartass_. "So I take it you're going to tend to your headache for today?" John nodded carefully.

"Jesus, just how much did you drink last night?" Jo asked with hint sarcasm. Carson stepped in "Well, we drank your limit twice over…must have been about three bottles between just the two of us. I'm impressed you lasted as long as you did."

"Well I'm not." John croaked as he poured himself a cup. Jo walked out of the kitchen; John assumed she was doing housework. "So how are you really John?" Carson bowed his head a little. "Apart from the giant hangover I actually feel quite good. I mean, I don't enjoy breaking down on you every five minutes but it's making me better, stronger too." Carson smiled proudly.

"Right, cure for a hangover, quarter glass of whisky. Trust me." John had a reluctant expression on his face. "I thought you were a doctor but now I just see you're a bartender just trying to get me drunk." Carson chuckled "Aye and why would I do that? Drink up." Carson handed John the brown liquid, which he swallowed quickly.

"Well, for one, it's fun, two, I'm hawwwt and three, I'm less of a jerk." That earned John a rolling of the eyes, "Aye, I'll go with that – although your ego is far too large for your own good." John pinned a look of mock disgust on his face. "I have no idea what you're on about!" Carson nudged his arm and John collapsed in hysterics onto the chair. "Ah crap, my head hurts." John took a deep breath to see Carson giving him a genuinely happy look.

"See, whiskey always works, my da' taught me that one." Carson dragged John out of the kitchen, with coffee in hand through to the living room where a large projector screen gently hung from the immaculate ceiling "Batman, dark night to be precise…"

"Ah, cinema buff too." John commented wisely. "I love Batman." John took a seat on the sofa a second before Carson did; they both got comfortable and played the film. It went well but there was minimal conversation, both men were engrossed in the movie until the credits rolled. "What a fine creation." Carson nodded in agreement.

"Right, seeing as though it's eleven a.m. what would you like to do now?" He asked clearly, "Uhhhh, I don't know." John replied.

"You're bloody useless you know that?" Carson shot at him. "Yeah but you love me for it." Carson rolled his eyes. "It's a good job." He said fondly, his voice almost a whisper; the atmosphere became intense.

Carson had always known he'd been attracted to John but John was never open about his feelings. Carson probably shouldn't have said that phrase in that manner without expecting there would be repercussions. Immediately Carson sensed them.

John respected his friend, the doctor, but to think of him that way was an odd thing for John. He'd been so careful to hide his true thoughts for years and now Carson was breaking down his walls. John wanted nothing more but to let him in; to know what life would be like if he finally found love. Who was he kidding? Carson was way too good.

Carson could tell John was in deep thought by the wrinkles forming on his forehead. "Sorry John, my mouth opens before I think." Carson looked at the floor in a scolded manner. John lifted his chin gently. "Yeah, but I've always known that about you. The thing is that you jump to conclusions way too fast, you have no idea what I was thinking."

John smirked at him and before John could do anything a warm set of lips had covered his own gently tasting him. They were long and sweet with a twinge of desperation and before long John wanted more; he gently suckled on Carson's bottom lip causing him to moan. John laughed gently. Carson's mouth opened allowing John to explore, making note on how Carson tasted and felt.

It was romantic the way they didn't rush but somehow they were both hungry for more. Carson broke for breath and stared into John's eyes "Now that wasn't expected." He grinned brightly, still only mere inches away from John. "No, but I like surprises." John eagerly leaned in once again before leaning back and pulling Carson on top of him.

Carson slid one leg in between John's thighs and his arms at either side of his head. They stayed connected for what felt like hours. "Carson." John whispered amongst the kisses Carson was placing seductively along his jaw. "Carson, please." The absolute desire croaked through John's voice as Carson saw John's darkened eyes filled with lust..

"What do you want John? Tell me what you need." Carson's voice was lower than usual and he was almost growling which turned John on even more. He groaned as his lower extremities became more predominant. John whispered right into Carson's ear, making him shiver. "I want you." Carson gave him one last deep kiss before helping him off the sofa and up the stairs to his bedroom.

Luckily Jo was doing the laundry downstairs. John had never set foot in Carson's room before now and it was a strange sensation. Glorious French windows curtained with white linen allowed light to fill the bedroom, and the white bedding gave a fresh feel to the whole room.

All of the furniture was pine, and similar to John's but it had a more well used look. Carson quietly shut the door behind them before John clung onto him once again, wrapping his arms around the doctor's waist.

Carson moved a hand up to cup John's face whilst the other carefully slid under John's jumper to find skin warm to the touch. Carson gently nudged John until they reached the bed where John lowered himself on his back with Carson still attached, with one leg in between John's two.

"Carson, mmm" John groaned as his erection was almost unbearable. Carson slid his hand right up John's shirt over his well-defined torso, tweaking a nipple making John jolt with pleasure "Oh Jeez." John stammered out as his back arched, pushing him into Carson.

He pushed the shirt over John's head so he lay there, completely trusting Carson. Carson nibbled his way down John's neck stopping at the crook, suckling the skin and leaving a mark that would be seen for days. The sensation was intense.

John hadn't realized Carson had removed his own shirt before gently rocking their hips together, their erections almost painful with the friction. Carson's hands roamed the length and breadth of John's body before travelling down to his trousers where he carefully unlatched the button and dragged them off John's legs. "Carson, you're killing me here." He worked painfully slow but John embraced the feeling making love rather than having sex.

At the demanding groans of John, Carson felt a surge of heat course through his body, causing him to rapidly strip himself of his own trousers. "You can make me lose control, Shepphard." Carson growled in John's ear making them both more wanton.

All that was left between them was their boxers, caging their raging hard-ons. Carson licked and sucked every inch of skin he could find, teasing John before he carefully swiped his mouth over the fabric holding John's rock hard cock.

John arched into Carson's touch as he carefully slid a finger into the waistband, waiting for a confirming nod from John. He carefully slid the boxers from underneath John. "I'm going for a full hat trick." Carson warned him seductively before swallowing him whole.

John gasped for air as he lost the ability to speak, the warm mouth enveloping him and pushing him until he came hot and hard "Carson!" He managed to muffle his scream with his fists tightly clenched in the sheets and his teeth gritted.

Carson grinned devilishly as he swiftly made his way back up to John's head, to kiss him tenderly. John could taste himself on Carson's tongue, and odd experience but it reminded him of what Carson had just done to him.

They lay there until they got their breath back until eventually Carson whispered. "Round two." John took a deep breath as Carson was the relief he needed. "On your front, love" even when having the best sex of his life Carson still took care of him, making sure he was calm and relaxed before proceeding.

John obeyed and slowly rolled onto his stomach burying his hands underneath his pillow. Carson leant over to the bedside drawer, collecting a small bottle of lube. He smothered the cool gel over his right hand before gently massaging John's area. "Do you trust me John?" Nothing more than a whisper was spoken "With my life."

Carson carefully plunged his index finger into John, letting him relax for a moment before retracting and adding a second. John let out a deep breath as ecstasy hit him once again. He scissored John, barely scraping over his prostate made John's own little soldier stand to attention.

Carson once again pulled out before adding his third and final finger, stretching John to capacity, John groaned loudly as he got more desperate for Carson.

Carson placed small kisses from the back of John's neck to the bottom of his spine before he pulled out completely, John felt empty until Carson lined up his erection with John's entrance. He pushed in with one swift motion, making John bury his head deep into his pillow.

Carson set a steady pace but slammed into John's prostate with every thrust. Carson's head dropped back on his shoulders as the pure feel of John overwhelmed him. "Carson, I'm nearly there" Carson slid his hand to clutch onto John's cock rubbing him gently until he felt John steadily become tenser. Carson trapped the base of John's cock with his thumb and index finger as he vigorously fucked John into oblivion. "Come for me John."

Carson released his grip and John's orgasm erupted, the increased pressure around Carson forced his orgasm into oblivion also. Both men collapsed, with nothing but a blur of lights. "Holy fuck. God really does exist" John claimed before his world went dark.

When they finally came round it was John who was planting the kisses on Carson. "I think it's my turn now." Carson chuckled as he was happy there with John. John lined kisses from Carson's jaw; to his already perky nipples; to his bellybutton and finally to his groin.

John took his time, enjoying the raw taste of Carson. He wanted to make Carson react so he gently grazed his teeth over Carson, causing his whole body to spasm. Carson planted his hand in John's hair, caressing it as his mind was being blown.

John blew gently on Carson which sent a surge through Carson's body forcing his hips to thrust upwards. "John…Bastard…Tease." Carson stuttered out in his thick brogue, so John laughed gently around him sending all sorts of reactions through Carson. "John. Please." John waited no longer as he quickly and efficiently prepared Carson, slipping in his hard member. Carson moaned breathily.

John set an astonishingly fast pace, to which Carson lost all knowledge of the world. John felt comfort in being engulfed in Carson's body. In the slur of ecstasy, John slurred into Carson's ear "You're beautiful." Carson blushed slightly as he became overwhelmed with heat, "Fuck, John." He yelped as he came – his muscles clenched around John, tipping him over the edge, coming inside Carson.

They collapsed once more in a blissful haze, basking in the afterglow. "Hey" Carson grinned brightly, almost laughing at what they had just done. "Hey yourself "John mirrored "I thought I was getting old but evidently not."

John gestured toward where they joined and Carson burst into laughter. After they had both calmed John took to laying his head in the crook of Carson's shoulder, resting peacefully.

Ten minutes had passed by before Carson spoke "I wonder what Jo must be thinking right about now" He smiled as John turned a deep scarlet and buried his head in Carson's neck - much like a child would shyly hide behind their parent.

"You almost look guilty, John." Carson said in amusement, obviously not embarrassed at all. "If I'm going down I'm taking you with me." John fought back. "Is that so? A mysterious pilot turns up on my doorstep and three days later ends up in my bed. Sure."

"It's still your bed." It was John's only defence as he was still exhausted from earlier events. "We better get up before she hunts us down and gives us a lecture." John groaned as he forced himself to roll out of bed.

He slipped on his boxers as Carson watched and headed to the en suite shower. Carson took to cleaning after himself, until John stepped out of the shower, his hair dripping, with only a towel wrapped loosely around his waist.

"It's back to your turn." John winked dirtily. "Aye, it may be, but you better get dressed or I'll take you up on your offer for round four." Carson pecked John before stepping into his own shower.

_What is this? A onetime only thing – just whilst I'm here? Long term maybe? I don't know for sure but I know that was the best sex of my life. It's not just that though, he understands me and doesn't think I'm weak. I could easily fall in love with this man._

John came out of his deep thought and quickly got dressed before doing his own sweep of the bedroom. He retrieved his cell phone from his pocket noticing he had got a message '_got your message, stay safe son. Can you call Danny, he's worried. I hope you figure everything out, I love you Johnny, and I miss you, love dad.' _Shepphard smiled, not noticing Carson's entrance to the room.

"Moved on already? Was I not good enough?" Carson joked as he dressed himself. "That's sick! Considering, that was my father." Carson snorted finding it hilarious. John was becoming accustomed to the fact that Carson was a generally happy person and laughter wasn't rare.

"Come on; better get it over with sooner rather than later, I sense that Jo is already waiting for us." Carson sighed happily. "It feels like I'm telling my dad I totalled his car all over again." John whined.

"You didn't? I'd never even think of doing that – moms are all collectables and are worth more than my life's savings." Carson boggled and John smiled. The two men made their way quietly down the stairs but even John's black-ops training wouldn't help John escaping.

As predicted, Jo was waiting at the bottom of the stairs with one eyebrow raised. "I don't believe it! I leave you two for ten minutes and you end up in bed. You're like teenagers." John couldn't help but giggle which earned him both a nudge from Carson and a glare from Jo.

"And you soldier boy!" Her eyes softened "If I'd have known that it only took you three days to make Carson all shiny and happy I would have called you years ago." Carson tinged pink as John smiled.

Jo clasped Carson's hands and spoke fondly "You, I love you more than anything in the world, but you really should think about some soundproofing. You've boasted your achievements to the whole bloody village." Jo swept him into a hug and John smiled contently.

"So, what are you guys now?" John and Carson looked at each other blankly, "Haven't had that conversation yet, Jo, but as soon as we have we'll let you know m'lady." That earned Carson a heavy punch to the arm, John just laughed, these two were like brother and sister but the love poured from them.

Jo turned and walked away, Carson brushed against John's fingertips and John welcomed the affection. They strolled after Jo into the kitchen where there was a platter of sandwiches ready to be eaten. "Oh and your mother called, she comes back tomorrow." Carson's eyes shot open in horror "You've got be kidding me?" Carson went pale "Christ Carson, she's only here for a day before she leaves again"

Carson dropped his head into his hands "Kill me now." John's brow furrowed in confusion and Carson looked at him. "She's an expert of embarrassment. She knows every tiny detail of my life even when she's nowhere to be seen! She'll be all over what we just did in less than a minute." Carson blushed furiously and John gave a small laugh, much to Carson's annoyance.

"Personally, I'm not ashamed of what we just did. Even Jo would admit to what we did if she was us. Besides, mom's seem to love me" John's comments reassured Carson but only slightly as he gently entangled his soft hand with John's strong ones. "I'm not ashamed; I just hate being the target of her gossip." They faced each other, making comfortable eye contact.

"Don't worry; I'm sure it will all be fine in the end." John dotted a kiss on Carson's forehead as Jo let out an _Aww _and a small squeak. "She'll love you John, you're both optimistic, unlike Carson." Jo commented. John smiled brightly, squeezing Carson's shoulders to comfort him. Jo left quietly to let the two men speak.

John sat on the stool, facing Carson directly, and spoke quietly. "What are we Carson? I mean, I know I've only been here three days but you've done what more than ten years of therapy didn't do. You fixed me and taught me that life is worth living."

Carson could see right into John's soul. "I don't know what we are John, but I know that I care too much about you to let you leave. Besides, you fixed me too, I was just okay before but I'm actually happy now, whatever our 'status' may end up being" John smiled, not holding back as he kissed Carson passionately.

"You're amazing Carson, and I would never leave without a promise of return, for as long as you want me." Carson kissed back equally as hard. "John, we need to slow down, I know mind-blowing sex was never meant to be slow but on an emotional level it could ruin the both of us, and you're journey has only just begun." John agreed but didn't let Carson's hand free as they sat there quietly.

"So what would you like for lunch?" Carson asked as he stood. "Or we could wait until dinner; I'm not that hungry unless you are." John spoke his mind. As Carson was turned the other way John gently slipped his arms around his waist from behind, breathing in his scent. It was an endearing sentiment and Carson leant back into his touch.

"John I want you to talk to me before we get into anything else." John stepped away slightly leaving Carson cold. "Sorry, I guess I just forget. Carson, I don't know what to talk about." He looked lost so Carson gave him a nudge, facing John with his bright blue comforting eyes.

"How about we talk about flying?" John's eyes twitched. "You want to talk about…Dom." He said with such insecurity that Carson's throat tightened for a second. "If he's a part of your story then yes, I do." John released his grip completely returning to sit on the stool.

"Well, you already know that when I left Atlantis I was offered a role as an instructor, kind of like Top Gun. It was only partially run by the military and the majority of them were SGC personnel that had retired so there was no DADT really." Carson nodded to him in encouragement.

"My dad already knew I was gay, I told him before I got posted out to Atlantis, and so I had nothing to hide. Everything was great there because nobody really gave a damn; we all had a theory that as long as the job was done well nobody cared what you did in your spare time.

It was a little…odd, at first, I'd never been in such an open environment but you get to know the guys who went out to Afghanistan that may have got a little too close to their buddies…" John subtly hinted.

"I think it actually made them better men because they did nothing but respect me for the reputation I had fought for years to uphold, to them I was a legend (A little OTT but it was good for the ego) I think the only issue they had with me was the state of my hair." Carson couldn't help but chuckle at the sight of John's thick black unruly hair.

"Then Dom joined the team." John took a deep breath before continuing. "He'd had a similar background to me and he had full clearance so I didn't have to worry about what said to him all the time. We were close and everyone saw the inevitable, even me." John gave Carson an awkward look.

"We ended up living together, we were best friends first and foremost, even though we sort of slept together a coupla' times. I loved him so much, he was my _best _friend." John sniffled quietly as a small tear trickled down his worn face, John looked old and tired. "I don't wanna talk anymore" his throat tightened and Carson could feel the pain in John's voice.

He slowly moved towards the sobbing pilot and pulled him into a hug, for comfort.

John eventually calmed and put some of his game face back together. "Carson, I've got something I need to say and I need you to hear me out before you say anything." Carson nodded slowly, his brow lowered. "I've been sent away because I flipped on a guy. He was new to the team and he didn't know much about the past, about Dom. He accused Dom of sleeping his way up the chain of command, and further commented on the fact that '_he got what he deserved'. _Now, I didn't even know much about this guy but my guess he's one: massively homophobic and two: a complete jerk who also '_deserved what he got'._"

John sighed and Carson waited for the outcome of the story. "Three broken ribs, two more fractured with a perforated lung. His lesser injuries were: Torn ligament in his left knee; a badly sprained elbow; a broken jaw and best of all a nice coverage of bruises with every colour of the rainbow. Fitting, I thought." Carson winced as the doctor inside him imagined the extent of the damage. "Training with Ronon paid off then?" Carson commented.

"I lost it." John gazed down to his feet. "I'm actually surprised I wasn't locked up. I landed a guy in hospital and it actually ended up me being read the apology. He dropped the whole thing so there was no record of anything big ever happening that day apart from a couple of bruises. What I did was horrible: no matter how much I hated the guy, that wasn't me that day." Carson rubbed John's back reassuringly.

"You know, I probably would have done the same if I were in your position." Carson smiled gently. It was the simple answer that John needs to ease the pain he'd carried in his chest. He looked upward and caught Carson's mouth in a chaste kiss, as if they had done it many times before.

"So. Coffee?" John chuckled and Carson threw a mock punch to his arm. "Ow!" John retorted as the cell phone rang in his pocket, bringing him to a stop. He gave Carson a questioning look before retrieving and answering it. "Hello?"

"John, it's Dad. Look, we need to talk." Jack sighed loudly, John knew it was serious. "Can I ask you if you really need to call me about it or is there some other guy that can deal with it?" There was a long pause "John, please. Are you on your own?" John rolled his eyes.

"As a matter of fact, no I'm not, sorry. I'm sat in Carson's lovely kitchen." Even through the phone he could feel Jack's patience beginning to wear thin. "He's got clearance, so I'm not worried. Thing is, me and Daniel have been recalled, and we're being deployed to Atlantis. A negotiation went bad and we know how to fix it but you know the deal better than anyone." Jack sighed, already knowing what the response would be.

Carson grew ever more concerned at the expression John's face held, angrier than any other he had witnessed before. "No." John gritted out through his teeth before slamming the phone shut. John was furious that Jack would even contemplate asking.

John didn't know what to do with his anger so he stormed out of the kitchen and straight to his bedroom. Carson left him a few minutes before discovering John curled up in a foetal position on his bed, how John could curl his long legs so tight was a mystery.

John looked so vulnerable and Carson's chest ached with sympathy. He stood at the foot of the bed so he didn't intrude on John's space, "John? What's going on, who was on the phone?" John slowly un-tucked his head from his shoulder and whispered. "They want me back on Atlantis." Carson was shocked, surely they knew what that place did to John?

"They wanted me to be a negotiator for a bad deal. All they'll do is suck the life out of the natives and then leave them to fend for themselves." John buried his head into his pillow. Carson shook of his jacket before curling up behind John, heat radiating off him.

John took Carson's hand, wrapping it around him and held it to his chest. "I wish I could go, I'd do anything to be able to fix my mistakes but I can't." John confessed quietly. "John, if you don't want to go back there they can't make you. Being a doctor I could tell them that myself."

John squeezed further into Carson's torso. After a few minutes John had phased out so Carson took the phone at the desk and made a phone call.

"This is Doctor Carson Beckett; may I talk to O'Neill please?" Carson waited a moment, _damn secretaries. _"Ah yes, General, Can I ask you…What the hell do you think you're doing?!" Carson was furious but kept calm.

"Doctor Beckett, I am sorry. I was ordered to ask, and I felt horrible doing it, but I already knew he'd say know. I'm relieved he did, John doesn't deserve this pain." Carson sighed with relief. "Well, at least you're not a complete bastard." Carson thought that he probably shouldn't have said that as it was dangerous to upset military brass.

"Well, I deserve that title anyway. Can I ask how my boy is?" He sounded genuinely worried for the health of his son so Carson had no choice but to answer truthfully. Carson thought that John need not hear the rest of the conversation so he stepped out into the hallway and to the room opposite.

"With all due respect he should have been dealt with years ago. Therapy may be an answer to one man's problems but it did nothing for him. From a doctor's point of view he's making progress, he's able to talk to me and share some of his burden though much of his darkness remains unknown. From a friend, he's doing a hell of a lot better than he was three days ago, he turned up on my doorstep as a tourist but now he's a person again. It's going to take a huge amount of work but I think he'll get there. General, he misses you, and Daniel. I think once he feels up to it you should consider taking a trip over." Jack listened intently to every word Carson spoke.

"As soon as I get a call I'll pack my bags, I just want him to be okay again. I know asking for my perfect little boy back is not possible but I'd at least like my son. I can't thank you enough for taking him in Doc; I don't know what he would have done."

"I'll call you with any more news general; I have to get back to him. Goodbye." Carson abruptly shut the phone as he was unsure as to what he should have said. Carson re-entered the room John was in to find him unwound but still as tense. "You're not getting recalled, John. It was chain of command." John let go of a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding.

"I'm sorry, Carson, you shouldn't have to fight my battles for me." Carson rolled his eyes "Once upon a time you did that exact same sentiment for me- in fact you've saved my life on numerous occasions, this… was nothing."

"No fair, it was my job to save your ass" Carson smiled. "Well it counts for me; anybody who saves my life is worth a small phone bill, even though my phone bill has already been paid off for the next ten years." John chortled but then gazed deeply into Carson's eyes.

"Carson, can I ask you something? Like something personal?" John hesitated; Carson found it odd seeing as though they'd been as intimate as any two people could be, and John knew Carson would never shy away. Carson nodded easily. "Carson, have you ever 'liked' me before this week?"

Carson's mouth twitched at the side forming a lop-sided smile. "You silly bugger, John I've adored you since the day we met. It sounds all cliché, but I mean it. After nearly killing you, you were so calm and charming it was hard to look away. I'm guessing you had no idea" Carson smiled goofily.

"I was furious when I was nearly hit, I stormed through that base with a P-90 in my hand, and I was ready to throttle whoever it was. You're voice, you were so apologetic but your accent was captivating, another thing we yanks seem to love. You had a way with words and I lost the ability to stay mad, so I meeted and greeted. I knew on Atlantis I couldn't risk anything about my personal life so I let it be, I assume now it was the same with you."

"You forget, I wasn't military and I'm definitely not American. On Atlantis I could do what I liked unless it interfered with my work. I do understand though, your career was your life, it sort of still is so I didn't interfere, as long as you were safe."

John sighed, "You're my life saver, and you always were. You sat for hours in that infirmary watching over me when I was down. I always knew you were there, talking to me- I can actually recount some of the conversations you attempted to have with me." John smiled softly.

Carson sat down beside John and gazed lovingly into his eyes. "I could never have left you with the state you were in. What happened with you and Todd…" Carson welled up a little. "You were out for over a week, you were holding on to a fine thread of life."

John, at that moment, took it upon himself to capture Carson in a passionate kiss to let him know he was alive and that dying was no longer a concern. Carson brought his hand to cup the side of John's face; it was a picture perfect kiss, the emotion flooding from the both of them. Carson broke for air, still staying as close as possible to John.

"It's why I ran, John." Carson said quietly, confessing. John just looked at him. "On Atlantis I knew where I stood; I was your doctor, maybe even your friend but once I came back to Earth there was nothing to stop me. It wouldn't have been a good thing if I had told you so I chose not to, I ran and I never looked back. The only contact I had kept was Radek, but that was only because he came over here, otherwise Atlantis would have been a distant memory that could pass off as a bad dream."

His brogue got a little stronger as the pain revealed it. "Nobody from this god damn town even knew where I had been apart from Jo; they thought I'd gone back to Edinburgh to do some more research: How wrong they were." Carson sighed.

"If you'd asked me a year ago I would have been mad that you left without saying anything but now I understand. Life sucks even at the best of times and if I could have ran, I would have. If you were ever in trouble I would have come running, the same as I would for anybody that had served with me, because I know you'd probably do the same."

"My point is, I sort of wish I'd have had the balls to say something, to stick around." John shook his head gently, "I think things have worked out better this way. I'm loving being here; being with you – my saviour." Carson blushed a light pink.

"John, without being dramatic as I mean it in a friendship way: I do love you, and I'm glad you're here too." Carson kissed John just as passionately as their earlier kiss had been. They lay there for a long while as they watched out the bay window as the sun set over the hills.

**I'll just explain this very first paragraph because I don't know if the unspoken joke will come through. The point is, John likes coffee and the scent alone can make him wake up from the worst of hangovers and come sniffing like a dog until he finds the source.**

**Also, the man-sex probably shouldn't have lasted for three rounds but I had high expectations...? I have no excuses, I just thought it was hot. Even if it wasn't written very well...**

**Okay, I used Jack O'Neill as his father but I actually quite like the idea. I have no idea how they'd come about to have different surnames. Maybe John has his mother's name? That means we're discounting the whole 'Sarah and Charlie' story. But for now I'm okay with that. However, that may change later on, so you are forewarned.**

**The whole love at first sight thing is also a bit of a stretch but I can sort of believe it.**

**I've made all of my excuses, maybe somebody could help me out and suggest any improvements, any details I need to add (Again, I miss half the plot, my head thinks faster than I can type.) Any nice comments would also be greatly appreciated, gives me incentive to continue...**


	5. Chapter 5

**This isn't the shortest chapter we've had so far but it doesn't have much of a plot that actually contributes to the story as a whole, it's kind of like a side story that lies down some foundations for future chapter and little references and thing.**

Day Four

The day previous had been that of no abnormal events, Carson did paperwork whilst John took a wander around the grounds. It was relaxing in the fresh air and John felt comfortable being there.

This morning, like every morning, he woke in his assigned bed. However, there was an odd feeling looming in the air. Carson's mother had turned up last night and was going to be joining the house for today before leaving once again on her world tour. John quickly got up and headed straight into the shower.

Once clean and refreshed he made sure that he looked appropriate as he did not want Carson to be embarrassed in any way by John.

He then chose to wear a plain pale blue shirt rolled up at the sleeves with dark blue jeans that were fitting around his that were some dark brown shoes, highly polished, in line with John's military history. He made his way downstairs to the kitchen area.

He smiled brightly at Carson and Jo who were awkwardly awaiting their guest, "Good morning!" He chirped regardless of the nervous look painted on Carson's face. The woman they awaited made her entrance. "What is there for breakfast, Carson?"

John had only briefly met her the previous night, she spoke with a refined Scottish accent that was sometimes thicker than Carson's own so John had to concentrate in any long conversations. "Good morning, we have a full English this morning. How did you sleep?"

Carson sounded like a hotel manager rather than her son. "That shall be fine thank you; I slept the same as I ever do in this house. Soundly." Carson smile gently at her, serving her breakfast at the table, John joined them.

"Mrs Beckett, can I ask how your trip is treating you?" John needed to say something to break the ice as John was a stranger to her. "Italy was fabulous, the architecture and even the spirit is wholly uplifting. Have you been there my dear?" John smiled, _Of course he had. _

"Yes ma'am I have indeed, I know the beauty you're speaking of, however; I was only there for a few days." The great lady frowned, "Why go to such a place if you can't embrace it?" It was time for John to come clean. "At the time I was a pilot and I was on exercise ma'am" She looked intrigued now.

"A pilot? What sort of pilot would that be?" John could easily talk about himself with her, it was strange. "I was in the Air Force ma'am and I was a helicopter pilot at the time, the one I flying was a rescue helicopter."

She glared at Carson who looked puzzled "It seems Carson hasn't told me much about you. Do you still fly now?" John nodded. "I retired about ten years ago but I'm currently a flying instructor in Colorado." She furrowed her eyebrows "Retired? You're hardly at the age of retirement."

John nodded subtly "I was involved in a…crisis, things took a turn for the worst but I fought through it, afterwards I didn't have the same ambition for the work I was doing." She looked at him sadly. This was the almost foul woman Carson spoke of yet she didn't refrain from emotion, in fact she was Carson, just a little bitter from life.

Carson stepped in "What would anybody like to do this morning? The garden is there to be used if you like" His mother smiled at him "Yes dear, we will have tea later on. For now I would like to invite your guest for a drive, I'm sure he'd appreciate my collection more than you do."

Carson rolled his eyes at his mother and John asked "Carson, how could you not enjoy cars?" His mother interjected "Never had the taste for them dear. Give him a stethoscope and he's happy." John chuckled lightly as Carson glared at him "Well I would love to join you." She clapped her hands together and they set of, leaving Carson and Jo in the kitchen.

"I did not expect that, you're boyfriend just made friends with your mother." Jo laughed a Carson looked blankly with his mouth drooping "Just wait till she finds out about his military history, and _us, _then she'll be all ears."

"You have a beautiful collection ma'am" John glanced at each and every one of the vintage cars lined up in what felt like a basement "You are kind, so what is your title?" She was ever enthusiastic about him "Title, ma'am?" She clarified, "Your rank and other such details." John nodded

"I'm a full bird colonel with the United States Air Force, I'm Colonel Jonathan Shepphard. I also have a doctorate but you're not to tell Carson, he doesn't know yet." The woman giggled "What of your family?" _Well, we all knew that topic had to come up at some point. _

"Well ma'am, my mother died when I was young from a car accident. I still have my father who is a major general in the air force, but he hangs out with the president these days but he's just been posted away. There's also his husband who's just like a dad to me, he's an archaeologist who has discovered so many things it would take years to list – he's been posted along with my father."

Mrs Beckett was shocked at the last statement, his father's husband. She had no problem with orientation, it was just unusual and hearing of it gave her hope for her own son.

They climbed in the car that Mrs Beckett had chosen and driven along the country roads, the fresh air blowing past them. "So what do I call you?" She asked, "My name is John ma'am." He smiled brightly at her "In that case, nice to meet you John, I'm Clara." She smiled equally as brightly back at him.

"So how did you and Carson meet?" _Dammit John,_ "I think you'd have to ask Carson for that story, it's much more interesting when he tells it." She sighed, "I know all about Atlantis John, I was told the very second Carson got on that plane to come home to me. I'm assuming he still has no idea because otherwise you wouldn't have delegated a moment ago."

John had a small look of embarrassment as his cheeks flushes. "I actually met Carson before we got to Atlantis, I was transporting my father via helicopter to Antarctica, Carson actually nearly killed me. There are these weapons that fire these energy balls, and they do a whole lot of damage, and almost impossible to dodge but I managed it somehow. When we landed I actually got to meet him and he wasn't what I expected, the events after that was what got me on Atlantis, see I can activate this control chair with my head and the expedition needed more people that could do it so my Dad pretty much forced me into going." She nodded attentively with her eyes carefully watching the road.

The sun had come out so he decided to carry on talking, she didn't seem to mind. "I was appointed chief of military operations, and Doctor Beckett as the Chief Medical Officer, as well as other various roles. People thought I had a death wish when I was out there, always seemed to get myself into trouble – a trait my father also had. There was one time when I had this massive bug attached to my neck like a leech, hurt like hell, Carson wasn't really there but he talked me all the way through it until I was able to get to the infirmary. He's the best doctor I've ever met, he actually cares about his patients, you should be proud of him."

"What makes you think I'm not proud of my son?" She asked carefully. "The fact that you've listened to me mumble on proves that you're proud of him, but when was the last time you actually told him?" She sighed deeply in confession

"I've never know what to say to him. He was always such a high achiever, he got into university and got a very prestigious job but I had no clue about his work, it was beyond me. I find it hard to praise someone when I don't know what it is I'm meant to be praising."

John understood that, "I was the sort of mother who always wanted him to have the world, the perfect job, wife and kids but I know now that maybe some of that may not be possible, however after meeting you I am a little more hopeful." She smiled softly.

"Carson is a good man and he deserves the world for what he's done for the people on Atlantis, what he's doing for me. What are you hoping for now?" John asked, maybe he could give her some insight. "I want him to be happy. It's after hearing about your father and his _husband _that I am reassured, but surely isn't it and odd family?"

"Well my mother died when I was much younger so I'd always just known my dad, not that I forgot about my mother but it was always my dad that was there for me. It was weird the way it all happened, it was about eighteen years ago, he came home and I was there after some training and he sat me down at the table and we Dad isn't a talkative person so when he did that I knew he meant it, he said he'd fallen in love, and that he didn't feel alone anymore, that he'd found happiness."

John smiled under the sun "He told me he was with Daniel, he seemed anxious about it but at the end of the day I was just glad he had found somebody, the next thing I knew he'd moved in and was part of the family. After that it was normal, and Danny is great, the things he talks about are magical and he's super smart and he's really easy to get along with too."

Clara smiled at him. "So why are you here, John, instead of with your family?" _dammit, she just had to ask, here we go. _

"Well, I'm sure you remember how Carson was when he came back from Atlantis – I was sort of the cause of it. The crisis that happened, well as I was in charge, I had to make the call. It was either do something radical, risking a few hundred lives to save billions of lives or do nothing and risk casualties in their millions. I chose the first, it was a 80% chance of death for us and I saw the positive, that maybe I could save everybody. Not everybody thought the same, in fact nobody did, and they thought we could fight it out. I knew better."

"I carried my own orders out, and with a huge amount of luck on our sides we came through the other end with two minor injuries, however I had to pay for what I did. I lost the trust and loyalty of everyone on Atlantis, and I got deported back to Earth. I was discharged quietly as even the top brass knew that what I did was what should have happened regardless. Since that day all of the people that were there have nightmares, some worse than others, Carson's being some of the worst I've seen. I came here because I eventually broke."

John had a tear building in his eye and Clara simply took his hand in hers. "It's a typical tragedy, I fell in love and then they died, only then did I really feel guilt about anything I'd done in my life, I beat a man until he was near death as a result. My Dad ordered me to leave the country so I did, and somehow I ended up here – I think Carson was the only one who didn't completely resent my actions."

"My son can be stubborn and even cold at times but he is always forgiving. I think what you did was brave, not in a hero way, but it was brave. However, you haven't answered my question." John nodded

"I ended up here, Carson was gracious enough to let me stay and so I've been here for the past five days. Carson has actually helped me work out a lot of my issues I have, and I'm getting better. He's sort of saved my soul." John knew it was cheesy but he knew Clara would understand.

"You love him." It was more of a statement than a question. "I think, that maybe I could." It was a good enough answer for now. John had been unaware of the time up until now as he noticed they were back at the house and it was early afternoon, they'd been gone for over two hours.

"It has been a pleasure, John." She stepped out and looked at him, "It's my honour, Clara." He placed a kiss gently on her cheek. "No wonder Carson was all over your lips, they're beautiful." She commented as she smugly walked away, John shone a bright pink.

"So how was your drive?" Carson asked his mother, "Very good, John is a very interesting man. However, I would now like some tea." Carson smiled "It's already outside being kept warm." John stood in the doorway as Carson watched his mother walk out to the garden.

"Tell me she wasn't too bad. You were gone an awful long time." John smiled at him "You have a great mother, she's awfully proud of you. I have no idea where the time went. She definitely knows about what we did, so we're in the clear anyway." Carson tinged pink.

"What did she say to you?" John stood very close to Carson, taking in the sights, "She can tell I'm a good kisser." Carson chuckled. "Is that so? Carson wrapped his arms around John's waist pulling him close until John laid his mouth over his.

Carson moaned slightly into John's mouth before pulling away. "Mum's know best" he laughed before leading John out to the garden where his mother sat.

It was a pleasant day and John embraced Carson's relationship with his mother and enjoyed the loving atmosphere that was clearly present. Later on Clara spoke to Carson alone. John, stood just in the kitchen besides the patio, knew it was a result of their earlier conversation and when Carson spoke to John afterwards he was warm and fuzzy.

"I know that was your doing, John, and thank you. I think I just made friends with my mum again." John wrapped Carson in a warm hug and his mother watched from the patio as the sun slowly set. She could not wish for a better man for her son.

**Is my writing bland? I mean, I can read stories where I actually laugh out loud or even well up with tears but I'm not really getting anything from this because of my downfall (Lack of detail) so PLEASE help me. If you want to add a couple of lines here and there to improve it, you're more than welcome...**


	6. Chapter 6

**So this is definitely the start of a new chapter of the story as a whole, it involves a trip back to America. Will it be eventful? You'll have to read it I guess. Please comment, I'm not feeling very enthusiatic about this story, even though I can't seem to leave it. I guess it's just for my own personal pleasure but I thought I'd share it anyway, what have I got to lose?**

John had settled well into the house and was enjoying Carson's company although during the day he worked at the surgery. John would occasionally bring him lunch or wander around the village. Life was feeling calm and relaxed for John and he absorbed every minute of it. Late that evening he received a phone call. "Hello?" John answered quietly. _"Is this John Shepphard?"_

"Yeah, speaking, can I ask who this is?"

_"It's Evan Lorne sir."_

"Lorne? What can I do for you?"

_"Well sir, I know you're in Scotland but I was wondering if you'd be my best man."_

"Best man? You're getting married? Since when?"

_"Since I proposed last month. You haven't actually met her yet but I know you'd like her, and she wants you to be there too."_

"Don't you want your brother to be best man, Lorne? I mean he's your brother."

_"I actually discussed it with him, he said that when he gets married he wants to ask his friend so we left it there. It would mean a lot to me if you were just there so it's your choice but there's a fitting next week, I hope you'll come."_

"I'll think about it, oh and if I do decide to come along I'm bringing a plus one, you know him anyway so I don't think it will be a problem. Have you invited Rodney? You know how he gets when he gets left out."

_"Yes sir, his invite has been sent. The plus one is fine too, I was sort of expecting it from all of the guests. If you decide to come it's in four days, call me when you fly out and I'll sort you out sir."_

"Lorne. You really need to stop calling me sir. You've just asked me to be your best man I think you can call me John now."

_"Okay, I hope to see you soon, John."_

_I haven't seen Lorne in a couple of years, seems like an odd choice. He did stand by me through the crisis though, and maybe it will be good to see some people again. Could help me figure some stuff out. _

John jumped when Carson rapped on his bedroom door "Come in." Carson smiled at him. "Sorry, were you on the phone?" He asked gently but with his accent thick with tiredness. "I was, but I finished before you knocked. How would you like to go to a wedding in three days?" Carson frowned in confusion.

"Lorne is getting married and he's asked me to be his best man, I don't know yet but the flight is in three days." Carson held John's hand as they sat on the bed, "Well if you decide you want to go I would love to go with you."

**Okay, so I think that really is the shortest chapter there is for this story, I do apologise about that but it's one of them slightly cliff-hanger moments. Constructive criticism always welcome, I've whined constantly at my inability to include detail and adjectives, so give me a helping hand?**

**Also, how are the accents doing? I'm not American but if anybody could give me any of their expertise in that particular it would be much appreciated.**


	7. Chapter 7

**I feel bad, it's another short chapter and it's not got much of a story... again. It's these chapters that I don't like writing because they're just the inbetween parts and you tend to loose the will to live if you're the reader so I do apologise, but bear with me?**

"Okay, we'll go." John stated quietly as he, Jo and Carson lounged on the sofa. They had barely heard him but Jo immediately shot to attention "Carson! You need to pack! Oh my god I'm so excited and it's not even me who's going."

Jo squealed and Carson laughed, standing to hug John. "What made you change your mind? Not that I'm complaining." John kissed Carson briefly. "I'm not sure really, it may have been Jo's constant bribery but I think has more to do with the fact that I miss those guys, and I'm sure you do too sometimes." Carson gently squeezed John close to him.

"Oh and Jo, you're still welcome to fly over with us, but I don't think you'd enjoy the wedding, they're strangers, but you could always go to the beach or something, it's warm this time of year." Jo squealed once again and hugged the two men before running upstairs to pack.

"You didn't have to invite her you know, she wouldn't have got upset or anything." Carson said sweetly. "You know what, I don't mind. She's kind of fun to have around, especially when you're working. Besides, everyone should get the chance to relax once in a while."

John kissed Carson slowly with a small grin on his face. "I think we should pack." John whispered into Carson's ear. "I'll catch you up, I need to make a couple of calls." Carson kissed John's cheek as he pulled away to pack.

"Where are we staying when we get there, love?" John smiled, "Well, we can either stay at my dad's cabin that's near by or we can camp out on the beach under the stars behind Lorne's house. It's your choice."

Carson was surprised at the choice but thought camping on the beach would be wonderful, however Jo would want a proper bed to sleep on. John walked away leaving Carson to ponder his dilemma.

Carson picked up the phone and dialled, "Hi, Doctor Stevenson, it's Doctor Beckett. I was wondering if you'd like to cover my surgery from a week or so?"

"You would? Aye, that's great, thank you very much."

_Here comes a holiday, a romantic sounding one at that. He and John could gaze at the stars if they chose to stay at the beach. The wedding will be fabulous as well, Evan always had good taste and his wife would surely match it. It surely would be a beautiful marriage. The people there will bring back memories too, for both himself and John – It'd be positive he was sure of it._

**I've tried my best to add more detail but I still think this story is lacking in something. Suggestions? Hopefully the next chapters will be longer...**


	8. Chapter 8

**There's a slight improvement on the length of the chapter but I still think it's short. In fact most of the chapters are, I guess it's just how I've chopped it up. I've got it on one continuous document on my laptop but when it came to uploading it on here I thought it would be easier to split it in the days that I'd already put in there...**

****This is one of the chapters that will have changed a fair bit, so I reccomend not skipping completely over it! Pretty much just more smut so make what you will of it.****

"Come on guys, it doesn't take that long to pack." John yelled up the stairs to the two others who were bustling around urgently. "Tell you what, anything you forget I will but you once we get there. I've got my whole life savings to waste."

At that point the two had just made their way down stairs and were loading themselves into John's car. "You really don't go anywhere without her do you." Carson stated, aimed at the car. "Of course not, I mean who would leave her alone when she looks like that?"

Jo rolled her eyes as she took her seat in the middle seat at the back. Carson glanced over the house before stepping into the car where John was arranging his seatbelt.

"Airport here we come. Jo there are a couple of bags of sweets in the door if you want them and drinks in the arm. If you want to sleep or anything just press that button and you can bring up the partition." Jo smiled incredulously. "You have a partition?" Carson asked with his eyebrows furrowed. "Yeah, I sort of got the car custom made." Carson rolled his eyes.

"That's our flight Carson, Jo time to go." John got up slinging his military standard rucksack over his shoulders and walking towards the gate. As they got closer to the wedding John got tenser, even Jo noticed.

"Hey, John. Relax will you, it's going to be fun." Carson rubbed John's back as they boarded the plane. "Sorry, I'm just nervous. I'll be fine once we get there, I promise." John kissed Carson quickly, much to the disgust of the older couple following the trio. Carson glared at them, and John nudged him "They're old; they don't know how hot we are." John laughed as Carson blushed.

The plane was small but roomy, John had chosen to fly business class so the seats were comfortable and the staff pleasant, a couple of hours into the flight Jo had fallen asleep, and Carson and John smiled.

"Are you tired yet?" John whispered to Carson as he snuggled into John's chest, making himself comfortable. "Mmmmhmm." Carson slurred out. John carried on reading the book he had brought with him, he wasn't ready for sleep yet so he read to keep his mind from wandering.

"Would you like a blanket sir?" A stewardess, with a thick brogue, came to John smiling at the sweet sight of Carson lay on John. "That would be great, and could I possibly get some water, I'd move but he weighs a tonne." Her teeth shone through her smile as she went back to the rest of the staff to get John's request.

John overheard their conversation. _"He is the cutest; I wonder if they're married? He's definitely American, and gorgeous too." The other woman with blonde hair spoke up. "They look happy in each other's company; I'd be surprised if they weren't married." _

The woman got the requests and headed back to John who was smiling at her, she blushed. "Well, I am definitely American but he's not. No, we're not married, but I care about him very much, even though he's taken over my shoulder and is probably drooling right about now."

The woman laughed silently as she wrapped the warm blanket around Carson and John and handed him a glass of water to his now free hand. "A word of advice, don't wait for the right time – we rarely see people as in love as you are, and when we do they always wait too long." She walked away to gossip yet again with the other staff but John didn't listen in this time, as he tipped his head back and sleep took him.

When he woke again they were landing and the jolt woke both Carson and Jo who had slept soundly the entire journey. John's arm had lost all feeling but he didn't mind now Carson had shifted his weight.

"Hey sleepy head, how are you feeling?" John looked calmly into Carson's eyes. "I've never slept so well. How are you feeling?" John nodded, "I feel good, some of the staff are really insightful. Come on we need to get going."

Once the trio had retrieved their baggage they made their way out through the busy airport until they made it to a cab. They had flown into Colorado so they didn't have long to drive. John gave the driver instructions and they were off.

The journey didn't take long and before they knew it they were in a small town, pleasant and bright with happy looking people. "Turn left here." John directed and they pulled into the driveway of a large white house. Lorne had a white picket fence, the whole American dream. Carson sighed in awe.

They stumbled out of the cab. Jo and Carson fetched the bags out of the cab as John went to the door. Just as he approached a young brunette woman ran out hauling John into a hug, struggling to breath John spoke, "Hey Lil, How you doing?" She let go of the man and smiled at him.

She was wearing a bright white summer dress than accented her dark skin perfectly. "John! You came, it's been so long! Come on inside, Evan is pacing, he had no idea if you were coming or not." John took the young woman to meet Carson and Jo.

"Lily, this is Carson and Jo. Jo, Carson, this is Lily. Evan's little sister and the biggest pain in the ass ever." Lily smacked his arm gently. Lily shook Carson's hand "It's good to finally meet you; Evan has spoken of you and what a great friend you were. Jo? You're John's friend, it's very nice to meet you – hopefully we will be staying here and having a girls day whilst the boys have their fitting, come on I'll show you around,"

Lily linked arms with Jo and dragged her into the house, leaving John and Carson to collect the bags. "John! You came, I can't believe it. Come on in and I'll get you a beer, we'll deal with the bags later if you want to leave them by the stairs."

Evan had a large open plan house, so Carson and John dumped their bags and followed Evan to the kitchen area. "How was your flight?" Evan asked as he opened three beer bottles. "It was good, still waiting for my car though, should turn up this evening."

Evan just looked at the two of them, smiling uncontrollably. "What is it Lorne? You look all happy and shiny." He laughed. "I'm just glad you guys got it together, and that you're here. I'm getting married tomorrow!" Lorne was extremely excited.

"So doc, what have you been doing all this time?" Carson shook his head smiling, "I've been working, I went back home like I said I would. What are you doing now?"

"Well, I'm a consultant now – after Major Davis got promoted I took his place, no danger and a comfortable payslip. Tediously boring compared to the old job though." Both John and Carson nodded.

Despite hating how they had left Atlantis, they both knew of the emptiness they felt in their lives not long after. "So, we'll drink this beer and then we'll walk into town to the fitting, it's not far." The two men nodded and followed as Evan lead them to the living room area where they took seats on the various pieces of furniture.

John took up a seat on the side of the sofa nearest the fireplace whilst Evan sat in the large arm chair opposite; Carson lowered himself next to John, sitting with a gap in between. "So, what changed your mind?"

John took a deep breath, "Well, I thought it would be good to see some people, I mean I haven't seen Rodney in at least two years." Lorne smiled "Yeah, good old Rodney, I haven't seen him in a good while. That's another thing; I heard Zalenka is living in Scotland, doc?"

Carson became attentive "Aye, he lives just on the other side of town, John and I saw him about two weeks ago for dinner." John interjected "Would you believe the guy went and got married, I thought he was going to end up like McKay but his husbands actually a really nice guy." Evan chortled.

"Huh, so John have you written a speech?" John pulled a face. "I forgot about the speech duty, I promise I'll come up with something, it'll be great." All three of the men had all but finished their beers when the conversation hit a dry spell. "We should get going."

"Nice colours _Lorne._" John hinted at the pink and white colour scheme for the wedding, although it did look beautiful. "Yeah well, I advise you don't say another word about it, she'll have your head." Carson chuckled as he watched the two men glancing at their reflections in the floor length mirrors. "The woman I have not met yet." Evan winked, "She'll be joining us for dinner, don't worry you'll love her."

True to his word the gentlemen finally arrived at the café where a stunning blonde woman sat, sipping her tea. She had gorgeous green eyes accentuated by her green silk scarf that hung carefully around her neck.

Evan stepped forward and kissed her on the cheek as she stood before introducing the two other men. "Amy, this is Colonel John Shepphard and Doctor Carson Beckett." He pointed to each of them "Carson, John, this is Amelia." John stared into her eyes, taking in the sight of her, Carson had the same expression.

She had an air about her that made you just want to look at her. She leant over and kissed either side of John's cheeks before moving onto Carson, she then gave a puzzled look to Evan.

"I'd like to take a moment to remind you guys of your sexual orientation, and also the fact that you're gawking at my future wife. Close your mouths, you'll catch flies." John and Carson blushed and sat down opposite the happy couple.

"The suits have been fitted so we're almost ready, how was your day?" Evan asked as the two men read the menus. "Well my dress is perfect, my bridesmaids have stopped arguing and all my family have arrived at their hotels. I think we can pull this off." She smiled brightly at him.

All four of them ordered their meals and turned back to conversation. "So John, I've heard so much about you. It's great to be able to put a name to a face." John smiled at her, "All good I hope, Evan has a knack for exaggerating." They both laughed, "Don't you worry, he speaks very highly of you." Evan blushed and John looked at him teasingly.

"Aww, Evan I never knew you thought of me like _that._" Carson nudged him, "Sorry honey, but it was about time I got some mockery in. Besides, he's not as good a kisser as you are." Carson glared at John whilst Amelia giggled.

"Hey! I am a good kisser!" Amelia quietened him with words of encouragement. "It's nice to have superiors around for once, gives him a challenge."

They all smiled and joked as they ate their meals; it was pleasant the way in which the whole set up felt completely normal. "Okay, looks like we're done. I guess we should go save Jo from my sister." John shook his head and followed the rest of the group out of the café and back to the house.

_Later in the evening… _"So Doc, I heard you'd like to camp out on the beach, there's a little camping spot just directly out the back, light up the fire and you're good to go, although you'll need the blankets from the cupboard." Carson smiled at the younger man. "Aye, it's weird being able to stay out all night and still be warm."

Evan grinned at him, "Yeah well, I'm sure one person would love to share a little body heat if you need it." He winked as he went to fetch the blankets, Carson blushed. When Evan came back, Carson looked at him questioningly.

"How can you be so open about it? I mean you're the brass now and yet you couldn't care less about the old military protocols." Evan looked strangely at him "That's exactly what they were, old. I never believed in them to start with, and Amy's brother is gay. It really doesn't bother me. I've known about you since our first conversation; John was a little harder to crack. He was always the hard ass commander, I mean day one on Atlantis and he already got to Rodney. He's the best boss I've ever had and I've never reacted any differently to any of his orders just because he may or may not be sleeping with a guy." Evan shrugged as he led Carson out the door and down the beach to the small camping area.

"I'm guessing you were nervous about coming, didn't know what the reaction would be. Truth is I'm glad you've got each other, and I'm glad to see you because I actually missed you when you left Atlantis." Carson couldn't help but smile.

They found their way to the fire where John sat lighting it and setting up a sleeping area. "Hey, what are you guys smiling at?" Evan turned to Carson, "Well the doc here just realised that my household has a rainbow flag" John giggled, "It'd be funny if it did, I'm sure my dad would find it hilarious, you'd be the butt of all his future jokes"

Evan rolled his eyes "Yeah, like he needs anymore material on me. I really don't know how Daniel puts up with him." John smiled "He doesn't, he sends him fishing instead." The three men sat by the fire as the sun set.

"It's getting late so I'll leave you two to it, have a good night, and John. Don't do anything I wouldn't do." Evan warned, always the sensible one. Carson lay down under the make shift lean-to making himself comfortable amongst the blankets

"You've done nothing but smile since we got here you know." Carson stated. John came to lay next to him, snuggling his back into Carson's chest. "It's a happy occasion, besides we haven't really done anything to make me unhappy yet." John pulled Carson's arm around his torso.

"Tomorrow may not run so smoothly. For now, I'm just enjoying you, and the beach." John turned in Carson's grip, laying a long kiss on Carson's lips. John buried his head in Carson's neck, taking in the sweet scent. "I'm really glad you're here." Carson smiled placing a kiss into John's hair, "Aye, me too."

John leaned up, capturing Carson's lips in a kiss, gently biting down on his bottom lip, making the Scot moan and give access. "John we're outside." He smirked, "It's a private beach, plus everyone is already asleep." Carson shook his head with a smile before melting into another kiss.

John slid his hands under Carson's shirt, touching all the skin he could before pulling it over his head. Carson did the same thing until they were both naked underneath the blanket.

John pulled Carson until he was situated between his legs, over him, kissing all the way down his chest. "Carson..." John whispered, urging the man to get on with what he wanted to do.

Carson took a firm grip of John and stroked a couple of time, relishing in the sight of John losing control, moaning into the air as his head tipped back.

He pulled out the lube from their bag nearby and slicked up his fingers before carefully thrusting them into John, stretching him open. By this time, John was completely incoherent. Carson added some more lube to himself before lining himself up, careful to keep the blanket over them.

He leaned over and John pulled him down into a long sloppy kiss as he bottomed out. After that Carson pulled almost all the way out before thrusting in once more.

"Fuck." John let out in a breathy moan and Carson bit his lip as John let his lips brush over Carson's shoulder. The pace increased and John could feel himself tense, so did Carson because now Carson had a grip of his leaking cock, stroking it in time with his thrust.

"I'm gonna come." Was all the warning got before the hot white liquid came out of John, forcing Carson to join him in his orgasm. It was intense and Carson pretty much collapsed on top of John.

Carson retrieved some tissue from the bag and cleaned them both up before laying back down with John, the blanket pulled over them.

They lay and watch the fire as it burnt brightly, warming their blankets and their bodies. The sun set far out at the horizon, casting an orange glow over them as the day turned to night. The temperature dropped slightly and John switched positions so he was wrapped around Carson, keeping him warm.

Just as he thought Carson was asleep he whispered to himself, "I love you." Carson smiled secretively, careful not to alert John, he knew what it had taken for John to say it.

**Was there enough emotion in there? If not... say so. I'm also aware that in this chapter my grammar is particularly awful but I've tried to fix it all but there's no guarantees... And yes I spell it colour. I'm English and there are just some things I won't change in my writing, I don't mean to offend.**


	9. Chapter 9

**Basically, this was the chapter that was missing from the story, so the chapter after this may actually make some sense now...Only noticed months after posting :/**

"Carson, babe, wake up. The sun's rising, come on let's go for a swim." Carson groaned as he rubbed his tired eyes. "Swim? John I haven't got my trunks out here, we'll go later." John rolled his eyes,

"Obviously you have never been swimming in Colorado. Come on, we're going." John pulled Carson up from his slumber, stripping him of his t-shirt. Shedding what was left of his own clothes, John made his way down to the water completely naked and jumped in, laughing as he did. Carson chuckled before stripping and joining him, the bright light reflecting onto the water.

Once in Carson shivered before his body adjusted, "You're bloody crazy Shepphard! We're going to catch our deaths." John made his way over to Carson "The trick is not to hang about too long, you jump in, you swim a little, you get out. Now come on, we're missing the swimming part."

John was about to go under when Carson grabbed his arm, staring deep into his shining eyes "I love you too." Carson broke John's line of sight by jumping in and swimming a short distance away, John soon caught up to him.

John wrapped his arms around Carson's shoulders before kissing Carson deeply, carefully pushing him under the water. Once they rose up again they were both shivering and decided to get out. Quickly making it back to where they slept they dried off and put their clothes back on.

"How'd you guys sleep?" Evan asked when the two men made their way back to the house. "Best night's sleep in ages." Carson claimed. "Good, then you're ready for when Rodney arrives? He'll be here within the hour, I suggest you two go shower that salt water off and get dressed. We'll sort Rodney and then I'll go get married, deal?"

John laughed, "Ev, you go get ready now, we'll shower and make some breakfast, then Carson and I will deal with Rodney. You can stay stress free and go get married." Evan rolled his eyes, "Fine, I'm going." He wandered off to get ready.

"Okay, let's go shower." John said plainly. "That is a poor line if you want company." Carson said suggestively. John calmly walked up to Carson and smacked a passionate kiss upon his lips. "Shower?" John whispered seductively.

"Aye, that's more like it" Carson giggled and followed John to the bathroom where they ran the water, quickly getting undressed.

John lathered Carson's back, easing the tension in his muscles, before reaching his arms round and leaning his head on Carson's shoulder, as he leant on the shower wall. John rubbed the soap all over Carson's torso before tweaking a nipple.

Carson's breath hitched and he let out a soft moan. Carson twisted his neck capturing John's mouth in a sloppy kiss as his hand hands roamed further south.

John carefully stroked Carson's hardening member, making Carson thrust into his hand, moaning. The heat grew between them and John gently rubbed his own erection into the crease of Carson's behind. "John, please, you're killing me here," Carson ground out.

John quickly opened Carson up with his fingers, slick with the soap before he thrust his whole length into him. "We're on a tight schedule, sorry." John thrust hard and fast into Carson until they both poured over the edge, losing their balance and leaning against the wall, panting.

"We better hurry up otherwise the chances are Rodney will walk in, and that would be awkward." The Scot laughed as they washed themselves off and exited the shower.

The two men quickly and efficiently dressed themselves before heading back to the kitchen. The sun was bright and it was a glorious day especially for a wedding. Carson took up the cooking whilst John did a quick sweep of the house, tidying and cleaning anything previously missed.

Once his job was done he returned to Carson who was cooking pancakes and wrapped his arms around his waist once more smelling his neck.

"What is with you and my neck?" He asked jokily "It smells good. Those pancakes smell good too though." There was a knock at the door. John sighed, walking barefoot to answer it.

"Shepphard?" Rodney asked with a shocked expression on his face as John opened the door "I think _hello _is the appropriate way to greet a person. Hello McKay." Rodney wafted his hand in front of his face before barging through blabbering.

"What the hell are you doing here? Lorne said you probably weren't coming." John rolled his eyes. "They key term being _probably, _and it's nice to see you too. Come into the kitchen, Carson's cooked pancakes, Evan's getting ready."

Rodney frowned in confusion, "Carson? I only spoke to Evan a few days ago and yet now there are people here that I didn't even think would arrive in a million years... Oh, I've got a bone to pick with that man." Rodney charged into the kitchen with John running to keep up. "You left!"

Carson turned around in shock. "You left with no intention of coming back, you didn't stay in contact – You left! Now you come back here and expect happy families, no, I won't have it. You left." He ranted. "Good morning, Rodney."

John interrupted; "See Carson knows how to greet a person," both men glared at him. "Rodney, it was ten years ago. I was in a horrible state of which you had no care for. I went back to my family and my old life end of story."

Rodney looked at the floor. "You left." He said in almost a whisper, he sounded so vulnerable. Carson slowly walked over to Rodney and grabbed him into a hug, holding him against the world for a few moments.

"What else was I to do Rodney? Come on, let's get you some pancakes." Carson let go of the sad man and collected a plate of pancakes, laying them on the table. "I'm sorry; I shouldn't have burst in like I did. I've missed you, and John I suppose." He sat down and ate.

"Hey Rodney, fancy a trip to Scotland, sometime soon?" John asked chirpily. "If you're anything like you were ten years ago, you need a break. You could always rival Zalenka." Rodney's eyes shot open. "Zalenka is in Scotland?" He sounded shocked.

"Aye, has been for quite some time now. I'm sure he'd like to see you for a short period of time." Carson teased. "What the hell is he doing in Scotland?" John rolled his eyes but Carson obliged. "He came out for a holiday and ended up getting married." Rodney looked offended now.

"Zalenka got married! Why didn't I know about this?" John whispered to Carson, "Told you he'd be mad when he found out, you haven't even told him the best bit yet." Rodney overheard. "Of course I'm mad! What's the _best bit_?"

John sniggered, "I changed my mind, I think Stuart would kill him within two hours." Rodney had his confused face on again, "Who the hell is Stuart. Oh wait, oh my sweet Jesus. Zalenka married a guy? It's like I never knew him." John comforted his exasperated friend.

"Well, I didn't know either but Stuart is actually a really good guy. He makes Zalenka less like…you. All insane and stuff." Rodney glared at him. "I'm not insane, I'm a genius. What the hell are you doing in Scotland?" _Third time he's rolled his eyes in under five minutes._

"Well, it was time for my consciousness to come back and haunt me, I got ordered out of the country by Major General O'Neill, so I went to Scotland." John explained in one breath. "Daddy kicked your ass all the way to Europe? What the hell did you do?" Carson chuckled.

"I sort of nearly killed a man." He said it nonchalantly "So you turned up on Carson's doorstep?" Carson raised an eyebrow "I'm not shelter for the bloody homeless Rodney, but yes, and I haven't managed to get rid of him yet."

Carson had a bright smile aimed at John which gave their game away. John didn't care and smiled back. "Oh my god. No. Not you two? You'll be the troublesome two, you'll wreak havoc." They both laughed. "Aww, McKay I'm flattered." Rodney glared. "So what else haveI missed?" His voice became annoyed.

"Nothing much but we may miss the wedding if you continue whining. After that the three of them went about preparing themselves for the wedding and calming Evan down, even though he was already tranquil.

_At the wedding reception… _"I've known Evan for… a long time. I met him far from home and he was the best man out there. He was a great soldier and a loyal friend; I knew that if I was ever in trouble, he'd probably be the one to save my…Anyway the point is, I could wish for no better woman for him. He deserves the best and he got so much more.

"I just hope I can be as good a friend he has been to me in the past, and I wish him all the happiness and good luck in the world. To Evan and Amelia" He raised his glass with the rest of the room before taking his seat next to Carson.

Evan stood up to say his piece. "Thanks, John. You know it's funny because it was always me saving your backside, you had a gift for getting yourself in trouble." The audience murmured in laughter. "I didn't mind though because it was usually for the good of our people. Without you I wouldn't be here today, so thanks. To Amelia, I'm just happy that you've managed to put up with me, and I will love you until the day I die. To my wonderful wife and to my best man."

_During the dancing…_ John and Carson sat at the bar, both holding identical glasses of whisky. "How are you?" Carson asked John cheerfully. "I'm okay at the moment, Rodney hasn't done anything stupid yet so there hasn't been any need for me to be the man." Carson nodded.

The barman came over to them as they finished their glasses. "Not for me thanks, John?" John nodded and the barman turned away.

"Carson, do you ever want to get married? I mean in general." Carson thought long and hard about his answer. "Perhaps, but it would be full commitment to me, not just a couple of good years then a quiet divorce. I'm a sucker for the sanctity of marriage, how about you?" John exhaled.

"I've been married before, I mean I did love her but I wasn't in love with her. I think if I was ever to marry another person it'd have to be the whole lot." Carson smiled at him sweetly.

"Here you go sir" The barman slid the glass across the counter to John. "Do I know you?" John asked as the face looked oddly familiar. The barman chuckled. "Paul Winters, I believe we went to the same college."

John recalled his face and his jaw dropped before he wagged his finger enthusiastically. "Oh my god! What the hell are you doing here? Last I heard you got your doctorate." The guy rolled his eyes. "Yeah I did, turns out doing occasional events for top brass pays though, I get a month's wages for a single night here."

John raised an eyebrow "Huh, wonder why I didn't think of that." The barman laughed at him. "Well you sort of went and made yourself the top brass so you can pay people like me." John smiled brightly back at him.

Carson sat back from the conversation but John wanted to include him. "So Paul, any family?" Paul cleaned the glasses as he spoke. "Two kids, Maegan who's seven and Laura who's eleven and of course my wonderful husband Caleb. How about yourself?" John smiled "Daddy, Danny, and this guy who I came across in Scotland" He winked at Carson who, joking, hit his arm.

The barman smiled, "Aye, only because you turned up on my doorstep." Carson fought back and the barman smiled. "Paul, this is Carson Beckett, Carson, this is Paul Winters, frat brother," Paul raised a question "Are you living here or in the UK?" _he was a friendly guy._

"Well, in theory I still live over here but Carson is in Scotland." He lifted his eyebrows "How long are you guys here for then?" John looked querying at Carson, "A couple of days, then we're heading back." The barman nodded.

"Well if you're ever this side of the pond give me a call, I'm sure Caleb would love to meet you." John smiled at took the small piece of paper from the man before stepping away with Carson.

"So, he's a nice guy." Carson started as they headed towards a small table on the opposite side of the room.

"Yeah, he was one of the good guys at college. Most of the times you'd get some dumbass to share your dorm room with but I lucked out, I was the first person Paul came out to, believe it or not I used to be completely fine with my sexuality. Anyway, Paul and I always had each other's backs – he pulled me out of a few hairy situations back in the day I had no idea he'd settled down, we sort of lost touch..."

They sat quietly as John's regrets washed over him until Carson spoke out. "I say we visit them, once we're done here. I'm sure you'd enjoy yourself." John smiled. "Yeah, yes I would." He chuckled in relief.

"Care to dance?" Jo headed towards Carson. "Hello love, I feel like I've barely seen you this entire trip. Excuse me John; I have some time to make up." John nodded, "Be my guest."

Evan had managed to sneak away from the crowds and sat himself down opposite John who was staring into his glass until jumping at the realization Evan had sat there. "Penny for your thoughts?" John smiled.

"Only good thoughts, I promise. You've inspired me…" Evan frowned questioningly. "I mean, to settle down, to build a real life." Evan looked right at John. "With Carson?" John smiled sappily. "I hope so. You know we've only been together for eleven days? It feels like forever."

Evan smirked as he could see John was in love. "What's your plan?" John sighed, "I don't know, I've only had this revelation in the past 3 minutes." Evan laughed, "Are you going to back to Scotland?" John had to think.

"I know that we're not going straight away – After that it's up to Carson, I want to stay with him, wherever he is." Evan held back laughter and John looked at him curiously. "Sorry, it's just I've never heard you like this before – you've fallen hard. Any man that can make you as happy as you are now is worth it." John blushed.

"Have you told your dad about you and Carson?" John shook his head. "He's in Atlantis which is a little far to travel just to tell him about it, I met Carson's mom though, she's a battle axe but the sweetest person in the world, just doesn't show it."

Evan nodded, "Can I get you another beer, you seem to have nearly finished that one, and I could do with a drink." John accepted the offer and watched Evan go to the bar and return with two pint glasses.

It wasn't long before Evan was found by the crowds and reluctantly dragged to the dance floor but John knew he was having the time of his life. He smiled as Evan danced with every girl there, from the very old to the very young and that smile never even hinted leaving his face. John wanted that.

He spotted Carson walking over to him and smiled, it seemed that Jo had gone and found herself a very nice dance partner.

"Are you okay? You seem to have been sat in this distant corner for a wee while now." He had a faint look of concern on his face. John just smiled and the whole room lit up. "Care to dance?" John stood and took Carson's hand, leading him to the dance floor.

The music wasn't slow but wasn't fast either; they seemed to be comfortable in each other's embrace enjoying the music and the surroundings. Some of the crowd gave them disapproving looks but altogether it was a pleasant experience with the both of them listening to the comments being made about them,

"Aren't they sweet, honey who are they?" A shorter old woman asked Evan in a thick southern accent. Evan snorted a replied happily. "Well the taller one with the dark hair is my best man; he used to be a pilot in the air force – John Shepphard. The other man is a medical doctor, from Scotland – Carson Beckett. I worked with them both on Atlantis ma', they're good guys." She smiled at him.

That caught his interest, he had just openly discussed Atlantis with his mother, and normally you had to have clearance to do that.

John thought it could wait until later and buried his head into Carson's neck taking in his smell, the sweet fragrant smell combined with a tinge of cleanliness and the smell of a doctor's office. Carson pressed a kiss to John's temple. "I love you, John." He was shocked and flicked his head up to look at Carson; he definitely had a grin on his face.

"I know, we've only been together what, ten – eleven days? What I'm trying to say, John, is…" Carson was cut off with an abrupt kiss from John he poured his heart and soul into it without making it feel desperate. He wanted to be in Carson's arms forever.

When they eventually broke away John looked straight into Carson's eyes "Carson, I love you too." Carson smiled as bright as the stars which warmed John's heart to no end. They continued dancing until the night was done, their feet sore but their hearts racing with excitement.

A few hours later the two men had said their goodbyes and drove to John's dad's cabin. Carson was nervous but John soon calmed him. "He's not here Carson, and unless he can travel a few hundred light years, he's not going to be here anytime soon." Carson smiled and kissed him before stepping through the door. Carson was astonished to see what was inside.

The shoddy appearances on the outside weren't a scratch on its interior. Beautiful plastered cream walls with red additions, the huge sofa that took up most of the ground floor, the beautiful open plan kitchen lined with marble and granite work surfaces, the oak stairs leading to the bedrooms that were fully furnished to the highest of standards.

"Damn." He uttered and John wrapped an arm around him from behind. "This, is Danny's doing. It used to just be a cabin but now it's sort of second home for them whenever they want to escape. They're constantly trying to get me to come down here, and I've always had a key."

John kissed Carson's neck before leading them to the sofa. Carson toed off his shoes before falling back onto John. They were sat horizontally across the sofa with Carson's back to John's chest, his arms wrapped around the Scot.

"This sofa is bigger than my bed, and that's saying something." John snorted. "That was also Daniel's idea. He's apparently got a thing for sofas." John felt the vibration of Carson's belly laugh and it went straight through him.

The fire was burning warm as they snuggled further into each other's embrace. They were now lying down and John had his back on the back of the sofa with Carson pinned to his front. John draped an arm around the shorter man's waist. They were feeling drowsy and it wasn't long before they'd fallen asleep.

One thing John didn't count on was his Dad actually making it home. He'd heard about the wedding and the fact that John had travelled back to America for it and he really wanted to talk to his son. Both he and Daniel had driven back from Cheyenne Mountain and quietly let themselves in.

Only carrying a duffel bag each they stopped at the sound of movement. They couldn't see the sofa clearly so Jack pulled his gun from his bag and took point with Daniel peering over his shoulder.

"Dammit Dad, how come every time we meet you end up pulling a gun on me?" John whispered sharply as he rubbed his eyes. John was an extremely sensitive sleeper and had the ears of a hawk. Jack took a deep breath trying to lower his pulse and put his gun back in his bag.

"Hello?" Danny quirked an eyebrow questioning the sleeping man next to John. John sighed and rolled his eyes. "Go to bed, I'll tell you all about it at a more reasonable hour." Jack chuckled and led Danny upstairs.

**So, there we go, hopefully that makes more sense now :) Doesn't committed John just sound so cute though? **


	10. Chapter 10

**So this chapter is kind of split up into two simply because of its sheer volume. It's also a pretty eventful chapter so I don't really want to overwhelm you :)**

Day Fifteen, Part One.

Carson shifted in his sleep and John immediately awoke. He gently laid a kiss on the back of Carson's neck as Carson turned to lie on his back. "What time is it?" He asked with his accent barely understandable but John had years of practice.

"It's ten a.m. Hey, you know you got worried because you thought my Dad might turn up?" Carson nodded curiously. "Well…He sort of did."

Carson's eyes shot open and John laughed. "Don't worry, they're still in bed and I told them that I'd tell them everything later. They're sleeping off jet lag so you either have time to calm down or time to run. I won't judge, although my dad really doesn't bite – he had a cute look on his face and normally… only Danny gets that face."

"Does not!" A voiced mumbled against a yawn as Danny traipsed down the stairs. "Good morning." John burst out laughing at Carson's nerves. "Daniel, can you do me a favour." The man murmured as he poured himself a bowl of cereal.

"Can you tell Carson that I'm a grown man, and the fact that I have sex hasn't bothered my father for over twenty years?" Another voiced boomed as it made its way down the stairs.

"I can acknowledge it, but I don't want to hear about it. You're still my little boy Johnny and Daddy don't wanna know. But yes, you're a grown man, and for the first time in your life you've made and outstanding choice of man." A blush crept across Carson's face as he sat up.

"Dad, can you not call me Johnny in front of other grown-ups? It's embarrassing." Carson couldn't help but let out a snort. "Baby, the fact that you still call people _'grown-ups'_ leads me to believe you're still a child. Therefore, I call you Johnny. Get used to it kid."

Jack wrapped his arms around Danny and was fed a spoon of coco pops by the man. Carson looked at how easy they were with each other.

"See, in our household we welcome love." Carson raised an eyebrow at John's statement, "You sound like a hippy." Jack snorted. "Yeah well, at least I'm not old enough to _be _one." John retorted to his father who slapped his hand to his heart with puppy dog eyes.

He released his grip on Danny to go back up the stairs to get dressed. Danny stood with his bowl of cereal. "He likes to see you happy, Johnny." He smiled as he put a spoon full of the chocolate rice puffs into his mouth.

"Carson, there's nothing to worry about. Jack may be some hard-ass soldier but he's a massive softy." There was a muffled yell from the upper floor "I heard that! Stop ruining my reputation!" John couldn't help but laugh to himself.

Jack eventually changed into some nice fitting jeans and a flannel t-shirt, he was showered and shaved and ready for the day. "Babe, we need to go shopping." Carson looked surprised at the term of endearment but judging by the lack of reaction from the archaeologist, it was normal.

"Yeah, I noticed. You need to ring Sam too, she hasn't heard from you in a while, and you know how she gets." Jack growled. "She just wants to talk to you, Jack. Last I knew, you two were _friends._ Now, go." Jack huffed before returning upstairs and making the call.

"You look like you've got a million questions. You can ask, I don't mind." Carson stuttered with the inability to speak due to the openness of Daniel, John gave him a reassuring look. "Not questions, it's just the little things. My family is quite closed, and therefore affection had never been seen or heard of. I'm just trying to adjust." Daniel gave him a supportive look.

"Yeah, I can get that. You've never heard an air force general refer to another man as 'babe', or get spoon fed, or demand hugs. That's just the start of it, I feel like I'm babysitting." Carson grinned as he knew the character he was describing. "Wipe off that look, I know that look. I'm not my father." Danny snorted, "Sure."

"Okay so that's Carter satisfied, what're we doing now?" Daniel shrugged. "Shopping?" Jack gave a shrug in reply and Danny made his way to get dressed after dumping his bowl in the sink. "Johnny?" He wanted the explanation.

"Well, you know it was Lorne's wedding – I was asked to be the best man. Carson persuaded me, unknowingly, to turn up. We decided we'd crash here seeing as though we slept on the beach last night." Jack was waiting for the rest.

"You're nosy, you know that? Fine. Carson and I are sort of…together now. Last night, we got in and crashed, not much else to it." Carson was focusing on the coffee table in front of him. "Johnny?" He prompted.

John sighed heavily, looking at the phased out Carson next to him. John slid his hand into Carson's, without him even knowing. "He told me he loved me and I told him I loved him too. I meant it too, Dad." He waited anxiously for a moment before a proud grin merged onto Jack's face.

"I'm glad, John." He then winced at Carson. "Is he going to be okay? Hey doc, how about we all go out for a beer tonight?" Carson flicked his vision straight to Jack, "Aye, that sounds good." Daniel came running down the stairs just in time and the couple made their way out to the car.

After a few seconds, John patted Carson's thigh. "Are you okay? You've been really phased out." Carson faked a smile. "I'm fine." John shook his head, not believing it. "Come on, tell me what's bothering you." Carson gulped.

"I don't really know. John, I've always been comfortable in my own skin but where I lived, there weren't many people like me. Coming here is overwhelming; I had no idea that this is what it could be like. Your father and Daniel are happier than my own parents were and they had no walls to climb. It's just, weird, in a good way." John squeezed his hand gently. "Is this the kind of life you want?" He asked in a low voice.

Carson bowed his head until his chin touched his chest. His back bounced as the sobs escaped him.

"Carson, this can be your life, our life. If that's what you truly want. They're happy because they've fought really hard for their relationship. Dad had to watch Danny die, twice, in order to get him back again. We've been through Atlantis, and we've found each other again, after all this time. It's been less than two weeks and I've been thrown into limbo. I could never have dreamed of what we have, Carson."

Carson eventually calmed but buried his head into John's chest as he slouched back. "Carson, I love you. I think you deserve to be happy whether it be with me or not." Carson looked up at John, "I want you with me John, and I don't care about anything else."

After a few minutes of just relaxing, Carson sat opposite John on the sofa with his legs crossed, seeing as though you could lay your legs in front of you it was so wide. "Okay, so what are we doing now?"

John shrugged, "Do you want to do anything today, I don't mind if you want to go out or with Jo or something." Carson just smiled,

"I've spent most of my life with, Jo. She can cope with a few days alone – which she isn't because Evan's sister has completely been engrossed by her and she's having the time of her life. I want to stay with you, John. I know it sounds awful but if anything happens to you, I want to be here."

John's mouthed twitched a smile before he sighed. "Okay then."

"Okay, so I was thinking we should do something tonight, I have no idea what though." As John stood in the middle of the living area Carson just strolled up to him and kissed him with his arms wrapped around his waist, "I think anything you come up with is probably an excellent idea."

"Okay you two, break it up." Carson blushed but didn't move away, instead he just rested in John's embrace as Jack and Daniel heaved in the grocery bags. "So, what are you guys doing today?" Daniel asked deviously after almost throwing a bag onto the counter, John raised an eyebrow at him.

"No…thing." John stumbled, which made Danny laugh, "We were thinking dinner, John, if you don't have any plans." John looked at Carson who smiled at the idea. "Yeah, sure. Where were you thinking?" Daniel shrugged as Jack walked in with another set of bags.

"Italian? We haven't done that in a while Danny – and Atlantis doesn't have pasta that good." Danny nodded, and left to make reservations. Jack's phone rang and he immediately answered. "Busy." Jack exclaimed and John smiled.

"No sir, I'm on leave. Yes sir, I know, but I'm not doing anything for that asshole if I don't _have _to. No the president can shove it up his ass, yes, I know the president so he'd probably find that hilarious. No sir, I'm not going AWOL. No sir, I'm actually trying to spend a little time with my son before I go back to Atlantis. Yes, sir. Have a good day, sir." John just stared at his father.

"God I hate that guy. He's like Paul Davis but worse, he's _actually_ an ass." John was still staring. "It wasn't important, John. I wouldn't have turned him down otherwise, I'm not stupid." John nodded before turning back and kissing Carson once more. "Yep, now I feel better." Carson snorted.

"Want to go for a walk?" John asked Carson out the blue, and Carson agreed. Within ten minutes they'd set off and were going down a dirt track from the cabin. "I thought you might have wanted to get out. I know you're a little more comfortable but still…"

Carson took John's hand in his own, which was something John hadn't done with a man before. It felt intimate and he adored the feeling of their fingers entwined and Carson rubbing his thumb gently over his own. The sun beamed down, peeking through the trees as the fresh air filled their lungs. John frowned and Carson noticed it straight away.

"What's on your mind?" John looked at him before sighing with a bright shine of a smile. "Say you'll marry me. Not now, not anytime soon, but one day. Marry me." Carson's mouth gaped open. He stuttered before speaking coherently.

"One day. One day I will." It was all John needed to hear before he indulged himself on Carson's lips, grabbing his hips and pulling them together, their breaths were shallow and their hearts pounded in sync.

"I love you." John smiled brighter than the sun itself as he stroked the hair at the back of Carson's neck. "Aye, I think I may just love you back." They both laughed as they carried on walking, hand in hand.

"I was wondering when you two would be back. Our reservations are for nineteen hundred and it's seventeen hundred now, so you have a hour and a half to make yourselves presentable, get going." Jack shooed John and Carson up the stairs, rejoining Daniel on the sofa and laying his head in his lap.

"You do realize you've just ordered your son to go have sex?" Jack frowned in confusion. "You gave them a hour and a half, you know John could be ready in ten, Carson maybe twenty… That gives them a whole hour Jacky-boy." Daniel chuckled into his glass of wine whilst Jack snorted, "I hate when you're right."

A hour and a half later the group was ready for their meal, Jack could see the sex written all over the two men but he choice not to comment, "Babe, who is driving?" Danny shrugged easily, Carson still fascinated by the pet name.

"I don't mind driving; in fact it's probably safer if I do." He smiled at Jack's offended look and spoke to him as if he were a child, "now, now, honey. You remember what happened last time don't you?" He teased and Jack gave a pout.

It didn't take long for them to reach the restaurant and it was a gorgeous night. They sat at their table which was in the far corner of the venue, and by far the most private. "So, Johnny…" Jack started, "How was the wedding?"

John smiled, "It was good, Evan's totally whipped, I mean he had pink for a colour. Although, I did get to catch up with a couple of people whilst we were there."

"Ah, Rodney." Daniel stepped in, with an air of sarcasm. "Yes, Rodney. I don't get your relationship with him, Dan. You hate him but you have profound respect for him." Daniel laughed, "Yeah well, he may be smart but he's a total douche."

"I'll agree with that," Carson said with a smile, "Although the poor lad spent a lot of time with me when I was in stasis, I was rather humbled." John's eyes went wide. "You actually remember?" Jack nearly choked, "Oh yeah, it's the magic. Also quite frustrating." Carson agreed once again.

Their meal was served as well as some general conversation but once they had all finished their meals they turned back to conversation, Daniel refilling all of their wine glasses.

"So doc, what are you doing now?" Jack asked casually and got an equal response, "I have a small practice in my hometown." Jack smiled, "Must be nice going back to where you grew up. I take it you have family there?"

Carson nodded, "My sister lives close by but me' mother's gone on some world tour with her friends so it's just me and my housekeeper now." John looked at him sideways, "Housekeeper? You mean the woman who is actually your best friend that runs around and cleans up after you?" Carson blushed and Danny gave him a smile.

They slowly drank their glasses of wine, carefully avoiding any inappropriate and in depth conversations before the waiter came to them with a black payment book. John offered to pay for half but Jack refused,

"Johnny, I make more than all of you put together and I have nothing to do with it apart from take requests from Danny. Plus, this is my treat." John rolled his eyes. "Well, next meal is on me. I don't care how much you earn in your top brass office."

They made their way out of the restaurant but both Jack and John froze at the door. The other two men almost knocked them over not realizing they'd stopped so quickly. "Jack?" Danny asked quietly but only got a reply from John. "Something's wrong." He said simply which made the adrenaline shoot through Carson, "What sort of something?"

**Ooh, cliff-hanger, I love it. This is where the drama begins. We all know that trouble finds both of the soldier wherever they go and when they're together it means double-trouble. I promise nobody dies.**

**Any suggestions for details would be welcomed as per usual but I think I just about covered this chapter...**


	11. Chapter 11

**So, this bit is going to be quite dramatic. Other than that, happy reading and any suggestions are more than welcome :)**

Day Fifteen, Part Two

"Give it a second." Jack said quietly as the waiter came over to him with a puzzled expression. "Waiter, do you have any odd customers in tonight - yes or no answer, I'm not looking for trouble." The waiter stuttered but calmly nodded.

"Is there any chance of these customers not being the nicest of people." The waiter gave a fake smile that Jack read easily.

"Dad?" John asked calmly and got a response, "Yes. You got your gun?" John awkwardly nodded glancing down at his calf. "Daniel, Carson, could you possibly follow the waiter to the other side of the restaurant where you will call whoever's necessary. Think of it as seeing their collection of wine."

Jack gave a smile and pecked Daniel's cheek before watching the two doctor's move away with the waiter.

John and Jack stayed stood near the front of the restaurant keeping their eye on a large group of men all in black suits. They looked like the local mafia, not in a good mood either.

Jack spoke to the front of house, "I'm Major-General Jack O'Neill, now I need to talk to you but I need you to pretend that everything is okay and it's just polite conversation, can you do that?" The man nodded with a large smile on his face.

"Okay, I'm sure you have an idea who those guys are. I'm warning you now that they could be trouble. I'm going to wait until help comes but if they kick off both myself and my son are armed." Jack ended with a slight laugh and John joined him.

John turned casually to his father, "You think they will?" Jack shrugged casually, straightening John's collar. "I think they might. Their little business meeting isn't going all too well." John smiled.

It took a few minutes but the two soldiers stood patiently as three black SUV's pulled up in front of the restaurant. Jack assumed they'd be FBI seeing as though the military had no involvement in these matters.

John casually strolled out the door to meet with the suited man who stepped out. "John Sheppard, ex-air force. My father and I noticed that there were a few men in the restaurant that didn't look like they were there for eating. They've got documents on the table as well as some gadgets. We think they're planning something but we haven't made ourselves known to them. Both my father and I are armed and trained and we'll help you out if you need it." The officer nodded.

"Can I ask who your father is?" John sighed, answering in a whisper, "Major General Jack O'Neill, Air Force." The man blushed, "Okay, well we'll get ourselves in there try and surround them quietly and get them out and take them into custordy. Is there anybody else in the building within your party?"

"Yes, Doctor Daniel Jackson and Doctor Carson Beckett." The man nodded, gesturing another man over who was obviously wearing a vest.

"Two men in the far corner of the restaurant, I'd appreciate it if you could get them out quickly, as well as any other of the customers." John smiled as he politely gave the orders.

"If you don't mind I'm going to go back into my Dad, I assume you are just going to surround them?" The man nodded which was all John needed before he made his way back into the restaurant.

Out of the corner of his eye he saw the two doctor's being led out by an armed man in full gear. He stepped to his father with a shallow grin, "So Smith said he'd love us to come and help him decorate, he's going to round up all the colour schemes so we can help him chose too." Jack raised an eyebrow to his son, smiling at the inallergy.

"Do we know what the colours are?" Jack asked casually but John shook his head, "No but he thinks they're the right ones." Jack nodded.

Before he knew it there were several officers sneakily entering the room and silently escorting the several other families out of the building. It was really beginning to become a big deal. The suited man who John spoke to earlier strolled in and whispered to the two men whilst holding his own smile,

"We may owe you one if this goes right. We've been looking for these bastards for the past six months." Jack laughed, "Always happy to do your job for you." John rolled his eyes at his father.

Next thing they knew several more of the armed police slowly circled the table, the group of men suddenly aware of their posititon. The whole room seemed to go from silence to outright chaos.

Jack and John both pulled out their weapons as they took cover behind some pillars. The men hadn't had chance to react before the police had taken each and every one of them and put them in handcuffs.

John spied out of the corner of his eye another man who looked like part of the group and didn't wait to react when he pulled a gun. John stepped to the side of him and put the gun to the side of his head.

The man swung around and hit the gun out of John's arms, returning to punch John but he wasn't fast enough as John twisted both his arms behind his back and pinned him down to the floor.

"That wasn't very nice mister nasty." John said childishly and his father chuckled as he took a seat by his son and the man. "See, now I just look like an old man now you've taken this guy down."

John rolled his eyes, "Everything is a competition to you!" He barked and his father laughed, "Not everything, I don't think of you as competition, just the crazy stunts you pull."

Moments later another armed man headed over to John and cuffed the man lying on the floor, dragging him up he pulled him out of the building where he joined the rest of the group in the van which would take them to the local holding cells.

The suited man once again came over to the two men, "Thank you very much. Turns out these men were planning a few bank raids and a few terrorist attacks. We've got all their plans and their people so it'll fall through but just in case we'll be watching out."

He shook both of their hands. "It's not every day I get to talk to the top. It's an honour to meet you, sir." He commented towards Jack who sighed looking at Johnny. "Did you really have to drop my name into this? Why don't you use yours? They'd listen just as much."

The man looked confused so John gave him up. "Colonel John Sheppard, retired. You've also got a world class archaeologist and a world class doctor."

The suited man blushed, "Could I ask you to keep all that quiet, we really just want to go home. We'll give you a statement in the morning?" The man nodded and allowed Jack and John to rejoin their respective partners.

"What the bloody hell?" Carson said to John and he couldn't help but laugh. "They were the local mafia with some big plans, it was a good job we got them." Carson still hadn't calmed, "How the bloody hell did you even know they were there?"

Jack answered this time, "It seems that John and I have some very complex gut instinct. I'm not sure what John saw but when you see a group that big with no food on the table you get a little suspicious. Then when you hear them speaking Arabic you get a little worried."

John stepped in, "Then you notice that the staff are a little edgy and keep looking at the really expensive cars outside."

"Carson, it's something you'll have to get used to. These guys have a sixth sense for danger but in situations like these it tends to work out for the better. Humans are nowhere near as dangerous as the enemies we've come up against in the past."

John went over to his shell shocked friend and drew him into a hug. "It's okay, Carson. Everybody is just fine." Carson nodded into John's shoulder, "How about we get back to the cabin and see if we can't relax."

John grabbed Carson's hand and led him back to the car where he allowed Jack and Daniel to sit in the front with Daniel driving.

Once they got back to the cabin Carson was perfectly fine, the adrenaline had worn off and he was back to his rational state of mind. Jack and John both propped themselves up in the opposite corners of the sofa whilst they watched TV. Carson chose to chat to Daniel in the kitchen area.

"You want something to drink?" Daniel asked holding out a bottle of red wine. "Aye, that'd be lovely thank you." He watched as Daniel poured out two glasses. "If you'll excuse me one second?"

He walked over to the fridge and retrieved two bottles of beer and walked over to hand them to the men on the sofa receiving a mumbled thank you as they were engrossed in the football.

Daniel made his way back over to Carson, sitting opposite him at the breakfast bar, "I draw the line at watching football." Daniel joked, "Aye, never really liked it, probably because of its name."

"Ah, the whole soccer and football screw up. Yeah, we totally messed that one up. I also think American football is kind of pathetic, I mean you guys have rugby which is just as physical and yet you don't get all the kit."

"Aye, I know I've endured a fair few injuries playing Rugby. I broke my collar bone when I was seventeen." Daniel winced, "Aye, had to spend summer all bandaged up. Never put me off playing; still hasn't." Carson laughed softly taking a sip of his wine.

"I know this may sound a little weird but what's it like in Scotland, I've never actually been." Carson shrugged, "Apart from in the cities, there's a lot less people, in my town there just over three hundred." Daniel listened, intrigued.

"Most of the small towns are surrounded by land that's mostly used for cattle rearing and things like that. It rains a lot, like most of the time. It can get damn cold, the worst it's been is minus 11 degrees centigrade." Daniel's eyes shot open.

"The accents are much worse than mine, I've had to learn to listen since I spent so much time in Atlantis, and so I guess my own as mellowed out." Daniel smiled, "People tend to be more private than over here, but you get to know everybody by name after so long in close proximity."

"It must have been fun as a kid having so much open land." Daniel commented, his glass only half full by now. "Aye, but I tended to stay within the house grounds. We've got a couple of acres so there's not really any need to play anywhere else."

"A couple of acres? Do you live in a mansion or something?" Carson chuckled, "Okay, ten acres and it's manor house, there's a difference. It's belongs to the family though." Daniel looked at him incredulously.

"Just how big is it?" Carson obliged, "Well there's five reception rooms on the ground floor, then there's the kitchen and the cellar below. Upstairs there's six large bedrooms all with en-suites. There's also my office in the attic. I'm only living there. The house belongs to my mother, it just so happens she's away at the moment."

"Has she met John?" Carson blushed "What did she make of John?" Daniel had an expression that looked like a gossipy girl. "Aye, I think she likes him. Although it was nothing to do with me."

"In fact it's all your fault Danny," John waltzed over putting his empty bottle on the side and putting his arms around Carson's shoulders.

"When we went out in the car, she basically asked me for my life story. I told her most of it, including Dad sending me away to get my head straight. I unintentionally mentioned that you guys were married and she was taken aback. After that she knew you weren't destined to be alone for the rest of your life because happily married gays aren't just a myth."

Carson blushed, "Aye, well she's never known any better." John pecked his cheek, "Well, now she does and it's all good."

"What's all good?" Jack then strolled in much like John had earlier. "Nothing, Dad. How'd the game go?" He shrugged, "They lost again. No big surprise. So when are you guys planning on leaving?" John looked at Carson carefully before answering.

"Probably tomorrow, late morning - give him chance to wake up - I think we've neglected Jo long enough."

"I don't see how you can sleep in past seven. It must be a doctor thing." John laughed, "I think it's a 'I'm not a soldier thing'. They've not been screamed at by drill instructors." Carson and Daniel shared a chuckle.

"Right, well I think I'm going to go to bed so I'll see you guys in the morning." Jack offered and Daniel joined him, "Good night guys." They made their way upstairs.

"How long have we got left?" Carson asked quietly, "Our flight out is day after tomorrow in the afternoon." John turned Carson around in his arms and stood him up off the stool, "Are you okay? You seemed a little shook up earlier."

"Aye, I guess after Atlantis I forgot that there were bad guys here too. I don't even know why I reacted like that. I've seen you in action dozens of time..." John kissed him, "Like you said, you forgot."

"And this hasn't affected you?" Carson asked in a worried tone, "I mean you're not exactly in the best of states." John sighed deeply, "I'm not sure yet. It hasn't even hit me yet. It might hit me tonight or tomorrow but it could hit me years from now. I'm not sure, what I do know is that I'm scared out of my mind." He pulled away from Carson and went back to the sofa, retaking his corner.

Carson sat in between John's legs with his back against John's chest he pulled John's arms around his and held them close. "I think you're a very brave man and it takes courage to admit you're scared." He whispered into the almost darkness as only one lamp was illuminating the ground floor.

"Can we go to bed now?" John asked almost like an infant and Carson carefully pulled him up the stairs and tucked him in climbing in beside him.

Carson didn't expect John to have a nightmare like he did. He was shouting as he flailed about in the bed. Carson did his best to pin him down whilst trying to talk him out of it. Jack came in hurriedly with only a pair of sweat pants on, Daniel following closely in the same attire.

Jack knelt down beside the bed stroking John's hair, "Johnny, listen to me. You're okay, you're safe. You just have to wake up." Almost instantly, John opened his eyes to look at his father.

Daniel came and sat beside Jack as Carson let go of John's arms and lay back down on the bed. He watched as Jack whispered reassurances to John. "What was it about Johnny?" Daniel asked quietly, holding his hand.

"Afghan. It's always about Afghan." Daniel sighed, his eyes glazing over. "You know you did the right thing. If you didn't go after him he would never have seen his daughter. At least he got that."

"I know. I just can't seem to believe it when I'm asleep." John replied and it broke Carson's heart to see such a strong man at breaking point. Jack looked over to Carson, "You mind if we stay a little while?" Carson happily offered, handing them some pillows and a blanket.

Jack leant against the wall next to the bed whilst Danny sat beside him, gently caressing the hand he was holding. John rolled over to face Carson, "I'm sorry about that. I guess tonight hit me sooner rather than later." Carson gave him a soft smile, "At least it happened sooner rather than later."

John leant over and pulled Carson into a deep kiss. It didn't last long because the other two men were still in the room. "I love you, Carson." Carson held John's hand, "Aye, I love you too."

An 'aww' came from down on the floor and John glared at his father. "Shutup," was the reply, "How come you're naked?" John asked getting his father back.

Jack blushed, "I've got sweat pants on!" He tried to justify, "Yeah but if it weren't for my nightmare you'd be all naked." Daniel tilted his head up and dragged Jack into a passionate kiss to which John made a gagging noise. Carson simply smiled as he observed the love that poured from the couple.

"Go on guys, get out of here. I'm fine now." John shooed them out of the room and they left, throwing the pillows so they hit John, "I'll get you back!" He threatened with a grin on his face before turning back to Carson who was just laid there looking content.

"Hey." John smiled softly at him and he chuckled, "I'm glad you're okay John." He nodded at Carson, "Yeah, me too." He leant down for a kiss, brushing their lips together gently. "But doc, I just had a nightmare and the last thing on my mind is sleeping." He winked and Carson swatted his arm.

"Good job we're not in any rush in the morning then isn't it?" He hinted, flipping one leg over John's two to straddle him.

Leaning down, he crushed their lips together. Rolling his hips forward John moaned, opening his mouth up to Carson. He gently caressed John's tongue with his own before rolling his hips again. By now, John was getting hard and was meeting Carson's thrusts.

John pulled off both of their boxers, a skill which Carson was appreciative of when the occasion arose. The next time they thrust together it was bare contact and both their mouths parted with a moan. John wrapped an arm around Carson, scratching Carson's back slightly with every moan.

Carson leaned over to the bedside table and pulled lube out of the drawer, knowing John far too well. John was surprised when Carson actually slicked his length instead of his own and before he knew it, Carson was fully seated on John's cock, moaning with the fullness he could feel in this position.

"Fuck, you have no idea how hot you are!" John mumbled out but Carson didn't hear as he tried to regain some stability. John grasped Carson's hands in his own and pulled them above his own head, allowing him to take some control.

Carson let out a groan as the change of position meant that John brushed up against his prostate. "Jesus," He cursed out and John pushed forward for another heated kiss.

After a few moments, catching some sort of breath, John began fucking Carson into oblivion, the both of them lost to the world as ecstasy surrounded them.

All of a sudden Carson got tight around the both of them and they both cried out in orgasm, almost passing out. Carson pulled himself off John before collapsing in a heap next to him.

"I think I could sleep now." John teased and Carson swatted him once again as they both succumbed to sleep.

**So, there we go, a bit more dirty man sex, haha. Either way, this is all I have to give for now but I'm planning a few more chapter so hopefully there'll be less of a wait this time...**


	12. Chapter 12

**Wow, I promised I'd get this story moving a little quicker and I suck! I hope this chapter can make up for it because it's kind of cute :) Happy Reading :)**

Day Sixteen

It was nine a.m. by the time Carson awoke but of course John had already been up for a couple of hours. Rolling out of bed, he managed to get dressed before heading downstairs to where the rest of the household was gathered in the kitchen cooking breakfast.

"Good morning." John smiled and pecked Carson on the cheek before handing him a mug of coffee. "Thought you could do with some of this. We've got a long day ahead of us." I hummed in agreement, taking a sip before sitting down at the breakfast bar.

Daniel had his nose in the newspaper, barely acknowledging anyone around and was only brought back to reality when Jack placed a plate of pancakes in front of him. "Can you believe this?" He exclaimed at an article and Jack shrugged. "There's always somebody saying something to piss of someone, I wouldn't worry about it too much, Danny."

"Morning Carson," Danny finally turned around and got a small chuckle out of him, "I really need to start paying attention, don't I?" He asked. "Not at all, I know how easy it is to lose yourself in writing." He smiled and Daniel gave him a genuine smile back. "I forgot what it was like to be around an academic."

"I'm offended!" John cut in, causing everyone Carson to snigger slightly. "Johnny, despite the fact that you are highly intelligent with all the qualifications to prove it, you refuse to immerse yourself in the world of academia. You'd rather shoot first and ask questions later - I don't fault you but we are not of the same breed." John pouted and Jack patted him on the back, "Don't worry, you can stick with me kid."

John rolled his eyes, "Thanks. Nothing like being a jarhead." He groaned which earned him a slap across the back of the head. "Wash your mouth out with soap! You and I wear the same uniform." He retaliated childishly and John giggled.

"Now now children, calm down." Daniel intervened as a plate was then put down in front of Carson who dug in. "So what's the plan for today - you guys heading out?"

"Yeah, we're going to head back to Evan's and pick up Jo and then figure out where we go from there I guess." John looked over to Carson for confirmation and got a brief nod. "Aye."

"Do you know what's going to happen after that? What are you going to do Johnny?" Carson could sense the nervous energy from John and didn't really know what to say. His Dad had a right to ask him what was in store for the future but at the same time, John was still in a fragile state and needed time to work out what he really wanted.

"I don't know, Dad. I thought that was pretty obvious in the way that I ended up in Scotland in the first place." He gritted out and Jack glared at him. "Don't be like that with me, John. It was just a question." He responded quite sharply.

"Guys, we really don't need to be having this conversation right now. John is only going to be here for a couple of more hours so can we please just enjoy it?" Daniel stood up, moving Jack and John apart a few paces so they couldn't get any more riled up.

"I'm going to go pack." John stated and headed quickly up the stairs. Carson shifted uncomfortably before Daniel smiled, "It's okay, you can probably calm him down better than I can." So Carson then followed John up to the bedroom.

Once inside, John slumped onto the bed. "That was ridiculous, I'm sorry." He said and Carson just smiled softly and came to sit beside him. "It's alright, Love. I know it's a bit of a touchy subject that even _we _haven't discussed."

"Then maybe we should discuss it, because this is driving me nuts." John turned and took Carson's in his own. "I love you Carson, and I want to be with you - I just need to know what's going on in that head of yours." Carson blushed a little.

"The past couple of weeks has been crazy, I don't think either of us can deny that," they shared a smile, "and I love you too, which is scary in itself because I didn't think something like this could happen. I have no idea what I'm doing, but I'm hoping you'll come home with me because I want you with me. I don't know what's going to happen, but I want to try as long as that's what you want too."

"Yes. God, yes, that's what I want." John pulled Carson into him and crashed their lips together in a passionate kiss, one that knocked the air out of both of their lungs before settling their foreheads against one another. "Are we crazy?" Carson whispered.

"Has that ever stopped us before?" John smiled, wrapping his arms around Carson and hugging him tight despite their awkward sitting position on the bed. "Thank you for keeping me sane." He told Carson once they parted.

"Are you going to go and talk to him? He's worried about you, is all." Carson said and John sighed. "Yeah, I know. I just couldn't tell him something I had no clue about." Carson pecked his cheek before shoving him off the bed and out of the room. "Come on, we're leaving soon."

They both traipsed downstairs feeling a little lighter. "Hey Dad, can we talk?" John approached the sofa where Jack was sat with Daniel. Carson took a seat on the far side with Daniel and watched as the two men spoke calmly to one another.

"I'm really happy for you guys," Daniel whispered to Carson who smiled, "I mean it, John hasn't been like this for a long time. You're good for him."

"I assure you he's good for me too. I'll admit, I wasn't in the best of states when he found me either. I just dread to think what will happen once he's all pieced back together." Daniel frowned, "What do you mean?"

"He'll have no need for me then. I suppose he'll move on to something new after." Daniels jaw went slack. "You don't honestly believe that there's a time limit on his love for you?" Carson just shrugged and Daniel said nothing more, mostly in shock over the whole thing.

A few hours later and the guy were packed and on their way back to Evan's house after their long goodbyes and the tears that would never be spoken of between Jack and John. It wasn't a long drive, only half an hour but it felt like they were on their return trip already.

Jo met them at the door as they got to the house and pulled Carson into a hug. "Please tell me we'll come back here again?" She asked and Carson smiled, "I'm sure there will be chance. I'm glad you've enjoyed yourself Jojo."

"Of course she can come back, Lily would kill me if she didn't. Besides, I'm sure Dad will make us come visit occasionally anyway." John smiled and Carson gave a half smile in return, remembering his conversation with Daniel.

"Come on, let's get you packed Jo. We managed to get a flight out for this evening so I can be back for Monday morning." She skipped away, catching up to Lily and ran upstairs as if they were thirteen all over again.

"Hey, are you okay?" John asked, sitting Carson down on the step outside the house. It was a warm day so John felt no need to be stuck indoors. "Yeah, I'm fine." Carson lied.

"Don't do that, I invented that line remember? What's going on?" He prodded a little bid harder for information and Carson sighed. "What happens when you don't need me anymore? I can't let Jo get her hopes up, I can't let myself either."

"What are you talking about?" John asked, confused by it all. "You came to because of your PTSD. I'm a Doctor that's understandable, but what happens when you have it all under control. I can see it already that you're getting better. What happens next?"

"Jesus, you think I'm only with you because you're a Doctor?" He exclaimed, almost insulted by the prospect. "I thought you'd give me a little more credit than that!"

"John, you and I want different things out of our lives. I want to settle down, for good. You have never wanted that, sure you've had the long relationships but your life is one thing after another. Once you're done with me it's on to whatever comes next."

"I get it." John muttered before walking straight inside the house. Carson groaned before dropping his head into his hands. "_well done, Carson._"

There was three hours of no talking between John and Carson before they had to finally drive to the airport. Lily was sad to see Jo leave and John was sad to leave in general. Carson didn't really know what to think and half expected John to stay.

Once at the airport, Jo rushed off to get booked in, leaving Carson and John to talk. "You don't have to come." Carson said quietly, staring down at the floor. John's jaw tensed before he sighed sadly. "Please don't say things like that, it fucking hurts."

"I'm sorry." He apologised which just made John's chest ache even more. "Look at me," He said, nudging his chin up, "When my head is completely straight, when I can finally sleep the whole night through and when I can finally talk about all the crap I've seen, I will move on to a whole new chapter, you're right. But what you don't get, is that when that day comes, I will stand before you with a beautiful ring in a black velvet box tucked in my pocket until I can get down on one knee and ask you to marry me, to make me the happiest man alive, and be with me forever. The whole new chapter will be _our _chapter, because even though you save my life everyday, you're not my Doctor, you're my fucking angel and I love you more than anything in the world."

"John-" Carson tried to speak but stuttered.

"No, Carson, I am not going to just walk away from you like that. When you say things like that my heart breaks because I don't know how to make you understand how much I love you and how much I want to spend the rest of my life proving that to you."

He took Carson's face in his hands and lay a kiss on his forehead. "I love you Carson."

Just like that, Carson was able to breathe again. He picked up his bags and wiped his face. "I love you too. Come on, we're going to miss our flight." He said simply, with a slight smile. Taking John's hand they walked side by side through the airport and booked in for their flight.

**Yeah okay, I know I failed to tell you that it would also be a kind of rollercoaster chapter too but hey, what's life without a couple of ups and downs? :)**


End file.
